pea in my pod

Bittersweet Summer

2010-08-08T19:19:00.001-07:00

It's been about a month and a half since my beloved mother in law passed away. I still grieve not having her around. I miss hearing her voice and her infectious spirit. This was our first trip to Fripp Island without her and it was tough. I never realized what a huge hole would remain without her presence. Her spirit was felt throughout our time there. I know for me, there were moments I would look out to the ocean and feel rushes of inspiration and joy. Moments where I could hear her laughter at the sight and jokes of what we were all doing or saying.

She was a beautiful human being and I aspire to imitate all the wonderful qualities that she possessed. I miss you Mama, and I hope we all make you so very proud.

Brayden turned two in June and that was another difficult time for me. For personal reasons I won't mention why, but it was a very hard month of June. I swear there were moments when I felt like it just couldn't get any worse. My kids were the only reason I was motivated to press on. Regardless, my son turned two and it was a reason to celebrate.

He's such a sweet, and sensitive boy who loves his "Momminy" (what he calls me). And I love him to bits and pieces.

Madison is now 10 months old (OMG!!) She turns one in September and I've been obsessed with having her party be "owl" themed. She's certainly a night owl, and she sure had a serious face so it's quite appropriate that we have the owl themed birthday party.

Nathan is currently working on the last chapter of his thesis (hale-frickin-lujah!) and should be done by the end of this upcoming week. He'll defend his thesis and has a job lined up to start as soon as he officially graduates. It's been a looooooong 5 1/2 years of school full time.

Me? I'm just trying to finally take hold of the things that I have an interest in. Things like crafts, painting, working out and making more of an effort to eat organically. I love that our town has a Farmer's Market every Sunday. I get to take the kids and expose them to supporting our local farmers and eating the freshest of produce.

I'd STILL like to take some sewing lessons, maybe take Madison for some swimming lessons in the Fall, and get Brayden in a part time day care situation so he gets acclimated with being around other children without "Momminy." When I say part time, I'm talking about 1-2 days a week (half days). I don't want the change to be so drastic for him so I'll get advice.

Other than that, here's some pics of the kiddos:

Happy Spring!

2010-04-23T11:35:00.000-07:00

The weather is FINALLY cooperating after all the rainfall we've had this past month. Our condo that we own and rent out flooded and our tenant moved out. We're still in the process of applying for a loan and getting the place reconstructed. The clean-up crew tore out all the lower kitchen cabinets and the bath fitter to get behind the walls and deal with all the moisture.

Not something we want to be dealing with when Nathan's trying to apply for jobs and finish his thesis. It's honestly been quite stressful for us. I take care of home/kids and Nathan has school, condo issues and jobs to deal with. I think it's safe to say that we both feel stretched and stressed out. Whenever I get like this I go into survival mode. When Nathan gets like this, he's not motivated to do anything.

This too shall pass I guess.

Brayden's now 22 months old and Madison is 7 months old. They're now at a point where they interact more. When I'm in the car with them, Brayden will look over to Madison and make funny noises and get her laughing out loud. It's the sweetest thing to witness. He's also displayed lots of nurturing qualities. When Madison's crying, he'll bring a toy to her and try to put it in her hand. Just a couple of days ago, Brayden was playing with one of his plastic trucks on the floor next to Maddy. She tore that thing out of his hands so fast it left him stunned. I chuckled underneath my breath.

She's sitting up perfectly and can play on her own for quite a while. She has two bottom teeth that are as sharp as razors. Her hair is finally growing in, and fast too! It looks like it's blonde. Her eyes are getting lighter and lighter as well. She's about 22 pounds and wears a size 5 diaper! Yes I know, many toddlers (like my son) wear size 5 diapers. What can I say? Baby got back.

Brayden has really turned a corner with his vocabulary. He randomly repeats words we say and constantly says, "What's that?" Our favorite words that he says are "Awesome," "Bicycle," and some of the names of our family members where he'll say it one letter off because he can't pronounce certain ones. He also surprises me with how many letters he can recognize. We'd be at a store and he'll look up at a sign and point to a letter and say it out loud. Thanks to Sesame Street and Nathan and I teaching him.

I've joined a gym and started going consistently with the kids. I actually hired a personal trainer for 4 sessions just to get me jump-started and motivated. This was the first time I actually did something for myself consistently. It's amazing how wonderful I feel after hitting the gym. I've lost 4 pounds so far since I started and I'm in between sizes. Realistically I'd like to be a size 4-6. I have a crap load of clothes in the attic that are collecting dust and I'd LOVE to fit into them. I realize I'll never be a size 2 again so I'll be donating those clothes.

I digressed a bit...back to the gym...Brayden on the other hand has not adjusted to the child care provided there. He now has separation anxiety. I've been called to come and get him within 25 minutes of working out. The last time went I asked the child care provider to keep him in there for another 15 minutes. He finally got over the hump of trying to make himself sick from crying and calmed down a bit. But now when I leave a room, he goes nuts and thinks I'm going to leave him for good. I know this is to be expected since he's never been in daycare before. They encouraged me to be consistent with him in bringing him back. Eventually he'll get use to it.

Quick Bits

2010-03-13T18:17:00.000-08:00

Wow. It's been 4 moths since my last post. I'll have you all know that it's been filled with the craziness of kids, Words with Friends (an iPhone app. equivalent to Scrabble) and lots of wine. I keep on forgetting that there are some people that follow my blog. In the words of Gilly (SNL), Ssssssorry.

Brayden will be turning 2 in June (holy crap) and Madison will be 6 months old on the 22nd of this month. What can I say besides the fact that I feel like my life is a temporary blur? I'm now getting to the point where I can take my chubby butt to the gym. I purposely added a temporary personal trainer to my gym membership to whip me back into shape. I needed motivation and drive. I need to regain my life back in whatever way I can get it.

It feels good to do something for myself you know? Like, I feel I'm a better mother because of it. At first I felt guilt because the child care providers at the gym didn't interact with my kids as much as I do. But really...who will ever love your own children as much as you do right? But I press on because I know that social time with other children is good for them, and alone time is good for me.

Brayden has been chatting his face off. Not that I can make out what he's actually saying. I just say "Yeaa Ok...wow, cool" and go from there. You can tell he wants to communicate so bad. He anticipates the moment I bring Madison down in the morning. He yells, "That's the Baby!" when I come down the stairs. He loves her and tries to make her laugh. It's the sweetest thing to witness. Madison in turn loves him as well and laughs out loud whenever he's near her.

I'm quickly realizing that they are both so different from each other. Madison seems very clingy with me whereas Brayden wasn't. She also seems a bit more impatient and a lot more needy. Overall Brayden's been such a good brother. He loves to harass her when she's in her jumper seat. He'll run around it and press and spin everything that makes noise or spin, causing her to blink a mile a minute.

I'm afraid Madison will be forced to toughen up due to the circumstances. But I feel deep down inside that she's very much capable of being tough. Just like her Mommy. But let me tell you that if Brayden ever tortures her, I'll be the first one to pin him down and let her get even. ;-P

Madison Sky Maugel

2009-11-15T17:44:00.000-08:00

No I'm not 7 weeks overdue. I've just been too lazy/busy/tired to blog ever since I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl named Madison. She was born on Nathan's birthday on September 22 at 12:38 pm. She was 8 pounds, 7 ounces (an ounce heavier than Brayden was) and 21.5 inches long. I had a c-section and it was a good thing I did because my doctor later on told me that my uterus was so thin, that she could see Madison's head moving back and forth through it. If I went through a vaginal birth, my uterus could have ruptured and it wouldn't have been a pretty sight.

She came out kicking and screaming. She sounded pissed. And I thought to myself, "this is going to be the feisty one." It's so surreal when you're lying on an operating table looking up at those bright spot lights. You're being cut open and you don't feel a darn thing. All I felt were the jitters from all the drugs in my body keeping me numb. Hearing the beeping sounds of what my heart rate was on the monitor and other random beeping sounds almost became a theraputic sound for me as I waited anxiously for the arrival of our baby girl.

She seemed smaller, or at least seemed smaller than what I remember Brayden looking but much to our surprise she was an ounce heavier. Madison's hair was long and dark and she inherited her Daddy's lips. Her feet were short and chubby and her hands looked like mine. She was the perfect little girl and I was so relieved she had finally come! After they wheeled me to our room they placed her in my arms and I took that opportunity to see if she'd nurse. And she did like a pro! I was so relieved because Brayden had a lot of trouble with it and I feared the same would happen. But she knew exactly what she wanted and knew what to do. That's my girl!!

I missed Brayden terribly and could not wait to see him. I knew I'd feel that way since it was just him and I spending everyday together for 15 months. My mother brought him that evening and he walked up to her, then quickly walked away not having any clue as to what was going on. He eventually gave her a kiss after we told him that this was "the baby." It was a sweet moment and I knew our family felt complete.

40 weeks

2009-09-18T17:38:00.000-07:00

Our daughter hasn't arrived yet but let me tell you that it physically feels like a slow and painful death. I have been having contractions lasting an hour (you know, the whole 5-1-1 rule) for about 2 weeks now but it's never progressed passed that. As a result, it's left me with an aching back and sleepless nights. And of course with all of that going on I've reacted in a really crabby way. I just feel moody and tired.

Last week when I had a check up, they told me I was 1 cm dilated and 50% effaced which means there's progress. That was pretty exciting to me and it gave me that boost of perseverance that I needed to get through all the physical torture. Well another week went by and today I had my last appointment. They checked me and I hadn't progressed at all. I was so discouraged and still am. I thought for sure I'd progress since then.

I decided to ask my doctor if I could be induced but she said it wasn't an option because I had a previous C-Section with Brayden and they worried of a ruptured uterus. Sounds scary and painful. What else could I do? I couldn't imagine going another week and waiting till the 25th to get a C-Section. I Then asked if there were a day earlier than the 25th that I can schedule a C-Section instead. The only day she had open for her to do it was this upcoming Tuesday, the 22nd. It also happens to be Nathan's birthday. Ugh!

Nathan and I talked about it because I wanted to know how he felt about sharing a Birthday with our daughter. I felt fine with it because to be honest, you never really celebrate one's birthday on the actual day. I'd most likely wait till the weekend to have a birthday party and have friends and family come over. Nathan said that he knows his birthday would be pushed aside from now on. I reassured him that I'd never not celebrate his birthday separately. Ultimately, he said he wanted me to be comfortable and he feels really bad that I've gone so long in the condition I've been in.

We're still hoping she'll come on her own. We only have this weekend. I'll be taking lots of walks and trying to get this baby wiggled out of me as much as I can. But then again, she just might be as stubborn as I am!

Brayden is doing really well. THANK GOD he can climb up the stairs by himself. He's fascinated with balls, cars anything with wheels and "poons" (spoons). He dances to the Peanut Butter Jely song from one of the applications on my iPhone. It's soooooo freaking cute. His memory is so good. The words that I taught him months ago he still remembers even when it's been a while that I've gone over them with him. He's really social and LOVES it when we have visitors stop by the house.

He's just such a great kid with a fun personality. Let's just hope he doesn't accidentally step on his sister's head or anything. At his age, he doesn't have a clue as to the new edition to the family we will aquire in just a few days. Here are some recent pictures:

Peek a Boo!

Brayden's morning routine: Throw everything in your crib out, and yell "uh-oh" over and over again till Mommy gets you.

Visiting our nieces in Main to celebrate Nikki's Birthday

Taking a hayride at Davis' Farmland.

Brayden attempting to color for the first time. He tried eating it but soon realized it wasn't exactly the kind of yummy snack Mommy gives him.

Waiting for her arrival

2009-09-09T18:02:00.000-07:00

Here I am at 38 weeks about to explode. I swear Nathan better not talk about more kids for at LEAST 2 years. Don't get me wrong, Brayden was worth all the aches, bloating, peeing, weight gain and wobbling. But when you only had about a 6 month break between those symptoms, there's so much wear and tear on your body. You don't get a break or a chance to get your body back.

Other than my whining, my pregnancy for our girl has been relatively smooth. Taking care of Brayden in the meantime is harder on my body but I'm doing it! I've got him going up the stairs on his own for nap times and bedtimes so I no longer have to carry him. The difference between this pregnancy and the last is that I don't have a scheduled date for delivery. That can make things really exciting. I've often asked myself questions regarding when I should set up the infant car seat, when I should have a bag packed, if I have enough food in my house in case I go tonight and my mother needs to stay here with Brayden, etc.

I went in for a 38 week ultrasound yesterday and she's so beautiful! She'll definitely have Nathan's lips. She's in the 80% growth (whatever that really means) and she's roughly 8 pounds right now. Let's hope it's less than that. Tomorrow, I go in to meet with my OB/GYN and she'll check to see if I've dilated yet and go over any last minute things. It's crazy to think that in just days, I'll be holding my baby girl.

Catching Up

2009-07-31T15:48:00.000-07:00

Good Lord I've gone way too long without any updates! Especially since now I have to try and remember all that went on after Brayden's birthday till now. The Summer up here in Massachusetts has sucked. The whole month of June (well all except for a couple of days) it's rained. July, most of it was rain as well. We definitely took advantage of any sun we got here.

Nathan and I took Brayden to the Zoo for the first time. I'd have to say that it was a little too soon to bring him since he really couldn't focus on the animals in cages that were far away. And since he couldn't walk at the time, he was in the stroller or in our arms as we attempted to point out animals. The highlight of that day was the petting area where they had tons of little goats that you could feed. All Brayden could do was charge towards them yelling, "Dog! Dog! Dooooog!" There were moments we were a little fearful because he had no fear and some of these little goats looked like they were about to head butt him, LOL!

**************
For the 4th of July week we stayed down in Cape Cod where Nathan's dad has a house and cottage just seconds from the beach. It rained a good amount of the time but let me tell you when the sun came out, we were like cockroaches coming out from the darkness making a B-line to the beach. It was Brayden's first time on a beach in the sand and ocean. He absolutely loved it. Papa gave him a ride in the back of a raft and then later on took him into the water where Brayden made loud beastly sounds as he splashed violently.

And of course I had some time to make it to the Carter's Outlet with my mother in law to stock up on girl clothes. I didn't go overboard but close to it. It's way much more fun shopping for a girl than for a boy. I felt guilty buying all this girl stuff so I made sure I got Brayden some things as well. Poor guy's going to get shafted by his little sister and she's not even born yet.

Being down at the Cape with our family was really wonderful. The low tides are perfect for little ones to play in and discover all sorts of shells and critters. And the week is not complete without ordering Lobster and fresh corn from the Farm Stands. And getting the occasional after dinner ice cream down the street.

About a week after we were packing again and heading down to Fripp Island, S.C. for our family vacation. Nathan's mother's side has gone for years, Nathan's gone since he was a baby so it was really special for us to bring Brayden. Last year he was just a month old and with doctor's visits and breastfeeding, I had no desire to be locked in a beach house while everyone else was out and about having a grand ol' time.

During the first two days there, I endured some serious tooth pain. I had neglected taking care of my root canal and it finally go the best of me in the worst way. I couldn't eat, sleep or keep from being distracted from the throbbing pain on the right side of my face. I had to find a dentist and get the tooth extracted. Lesson learned. I will never let a bad tooth get to that point ever again.

Fripp Island is such a great place because everyone rides around in golf carts and takes things easy. There are tons of pools you can choose from and lots of things for kids to do. They have wild deer that roam the island and are really docile. Brayden got to touch one, again, no fear in that kid. We went to the beach and pool everyday to meet up with family and catch up. Nathan and I even got to go out one night alone for dinner. We had tons of offers to babysit which was such a nice thing!

Brayden with his Great Nana and Papa:

Kiddie Pool time with daddy:

Life's a Beach with mommy:

Our family picture traditionally taken on the sunset Fripper Cruise:

Happy First Birthday Brayden

2009-06-20T17:59:00.000-07:00

"Time flies" never rang so true for me. His first birthday came too soon. It actually crept up behind me. I realized that I kept on answering "Oh he's eleven months old " when really he was about to turn one. I made him a cake for his actual birthday which was yesterday. It was a simple vanilla cake and whipped frosting. He really had no idea what was going on. I put his party hat on and Nathan, my mother and I started singing "Happy Birthday."

He kept looking at us with a blank stare as we sang. He then stuck his finger into the icing and gave it a taste. Apparently he liked it because 5 minutes later when he got his slice of cake he rammed a huge piece of it in his mouth. All I kept on thinking was, "Oh my God he's going to choke." I also thought "Eek, that blue icing is going to stain everything!" But then I said, what the heck it's his birthday for crying out loud. It actually felt good to let go of that one. I got to finish his scrapbook last night just in time to bring it to his party today. His party had a frog theme to it and I invited family and close friends. It turned out to be a really beautiful day and some of the kids including Brayden got to enjoy the pool that Papa had worked so hard at cleaning. The sun was out and it was hot. We had the grill going and life was good. My good friend Laurie made the Birthday Cake. She went off the invitations and really did an excellent job baking a 2 layer cake. One layer was a chocolate cake and the other was a healthier vanilla pumpkin cake for the kiddos. It was amazingly moist and deeeelicious! Here's a picture of it:

Auntie Sarah took most of the pictures for me so I'll post more when I get them. He received some really great toys which made me happy because he's been playing with his "baby" toys for a while now and it was time to refresh his toy box. Being Brayden's mother has really been such a blessing. As I reflect over the past year I see just how much he has made me a better person. I've had some hard times and yet he always managed to put a smile on my face and help keep my heart soft. Every morning although tired, I look forward to opening his bedroom door and finding him standing up in his crib ready to greet me. He's my buddy and I really cherish this time that I get to spend alone with him before baby girl arrives. Brayden has grown leaps and bounds in words he understands and now says. He's already taken some steps and is sooo close to officially walking.

Top 10 Things You'll Probably Never Say

2009-05-31T09:11:00.000-07:00

"No more Arugula. You'll get a bellyache."
"Gosh, I wish I could keep pumping forever–it's such a gratifying experience and makes me feel like a real woman."
"After my second pregnancy, I just couldn't keep the weight on!"
"Honey, lets play Barbies again and I'll be the bad sister. Again."
"You know, I'm actually sharper when I'm awakened every two hours!"
"All I want to do after a long day with the kids is have sex with my husband."
"Why don't you tr something pink? You don't have enough pink clothing."
"My new favorite song is 'Fruit Salad.' Totally downloading it."
"I regret getting that epidural."
"Thank you so much for the advice about everything I'm doing wrong with my kid. I found it really helpful."

Source: Parenting Magazine, March, 2009

Leaps and Bounds

2009-05-13T18:07:00.000-07:00

It's been about a month since the last time I blogged, whoopsie! It's been busy, crazy and full. Brayden started his swimming class and has really become quite the water baby. We've had 3 classes so far and he's already been underwater. They do all sorts of nursery songs that go along with kicking in the water, paddling, splashing and blowing bubbles. My good friend Laurie and her son joined the class to keep me company. She's already taken the class so it was really thoughtful of her to join it again to keep me company.

Within a month Brayden started crawling (army style), going from a laying down position to sitting up, pulling himself up and even standing up in his crib! We have a morning ritual where I feed him, put him on the floor in the livingroom, and watch him take out all the DVD's from the shelf as I sip my coffee and check emails. Good times. The wonderful part of watching him do all of this is this sense of pride he has and how he expresses it. For instance, if I see him struggling to pull himself up on the edge of the couch, I'll say, "You got it Brayden, you can do it." He'll look back at me and then turn forward and try again. And when he gets up, he looks back to see if I'm watching him. I sing his praises, "You did it Brayden!! Look at you big boy, yaaaayyy!!!" Then he puffs out his chest and smiles and starts pumping his legs.

He already knows what the words "ball," "feet," shoes," "eat," "water," and "up," are as well as the obvious "Mommy and Daddy" words. He tries to say them by pronouncing their first letter. I'm sure he understand more, I just think it's truly amazing how babies understand so much without being able to speak yet. He knows what it is to whisper when I ask him to do so. Him and I share lots of laughter everyday without saying a word. We'll just look at each other, mimmick a sound and one of us laughs.

I'm 5 months pregnant now and she's growing. I'm starting to feel her move more now that her bones are getting stronger. I've also had contractions already. Weird I know. I'm so excited to have a girl. Nathan was scared at first but now he too is excited. We've already picked a name for her. We had it picked out when I was pregnant with Brayden. I've looked at other names, but this one just seems to stick. So we're keepin' it. I bet it's killing you to know the name. You're probably wondering if I'm going to mention it in this blog. You might even be scrolling ahead of what you're reading to find out. ;-) Well I'm not telling, yet. Some of our family already know what her name will be. I just might prolong it just to torture you. Bwuahhahahaaaaa!

I leave you with other really cute pics of Brayden:

It's a GIRL!

2009-04-23T19:02:00.000-07:00

HI everyone! Today couldn't come sooner I tell you. I was anxious this morning as we were driving to Boston for the ultrasound. I thought for sure I was having another boy. I mentally prepared myself for that news. I wouldn't have been sad, but it would have been more of a push to have the 3rd kid because I wanted a girl.

It took a little over an hour for 2 doctors to find what we were looking for. Not only were the baby's legs crossed and up to her stomach, but she's also breached and is facing my back. My placenta is also located on the front of my stomach and to her back. Feeling her kicks will be extremely hard if she doesn't rotate upside down and forward.

I did notice before the doctors did, that there was no sight of a penis. I turned towards Nathan and said, "It's a girl." The other doctor came in and had me move a little to get her to move. Finally he confirmed that it was in fact a girl. I even got to see "the goods." After we left I just kept on saying, "Nathan, we're having a girl!" It was surreal for me so I felt the need to say it over and over again.

I'm also excited for my step sister-in-law because she too is having a girl and is a couple of weeks ahead of me. So they'll grow up together, have their tea times, play dress up, etc. while Brayden and his two boy cousins play together.

OF COURSE you know I had to buy some pink today. I ended up going to T.J. Maxx and buying a few girlie outfits. I got an outfit for Brayden too so he wouldn't feel left out. I know he could care less and has no clue as to what's going on. Now that I know we're having a girl, I can start my mission of getting the crib, bedding and clothes. Oh man am I going to have fun.

Thank GOD for nice weather

2009-04-14T14:42:00.001-07:00

Today marked the warmest day we've had this year so far. It was 59 degrees and sunny. Of course whenever it's at least 50 degrees I take B to the park to play in the swing, then go for my mile walk. Today was a little different. This time we could finally sit by the man-made beach without getting our pants soaked. Brayden was fascinated with the grass and the twigs he found along the pond. He ran his little chubby fingers through the grass and waved at anyone who passed by along the walkway.

Which by the way he started waving "hi." He first waved hi to my sister in law Sarah last week. After that, he's waved at anyone and everyone. It's really sweet watching him doing it too. Up next is to teach him to blow kisses. I feel like this month has been a very important developmental period for him. It's hard catching up with all the new things he's doing. I cherish it in my heart throughout the day.

I'm now 17 weeks pregnant and growing as ever. Next week we go into Boston to find out the sex of the baby. I cannot WAIT! My sister in law Melissa is having a girl (thank the LORD Almighty.) She has two boys and we were all hoping she's get her dream of having a girl and she is. I seriously couldn't be any happier for her. She needs another girl in that house. I am wishing for a girl myself. We'll see!

I start to get a little sad thinking about Brayden not having my full attention when baby #2 comes. It's like we've become buddies and soon I'll need to split my time and energy on his sibling. I don't like to think of it much because it makes me want to cry.

ANYhow, I'm happy to hear that the weather will remain nice all week and I plan on going out everyday. Fresh air does wonders for Brayden and I and plus, these moments I have with him alone are so precious.

16 weeks

2009-04-06T17:55:00.000-07:00

I was looking at my pregnancy pictures and noticed that I'm just as big now as I was when I was 21 weeks with Brayden. So yea, no belly shots for this pregnancy. To make things even more exciting around here, I'm heavier than Nathan! So am I fat or is he skinny? Oy-vey.

I've been feeling fluttering within the past week which is making it all the more real to me. I think I'll be able to notice things quicker with the second one because now I know what to expect. I'm still exhausted everyday and need to get a nap in. Headaches are just a given and I've learned to cope with them.

Brayden is becoming a lot more fussy these days. I can't make out whether or not it's his top teeth coming in or if he's just becoming more attached to me. I can get things done when he's playing but most of the time when I'm around him or just want to play with him and his toys, he'll want me to pick him up or stand him up. And after a while my back hurts. He's also whining when he eats. I'm not sure how to deal with that. Nathan told me today that maybe he needs to get out more. He spends all day with me and it might be the reason why he's been like this.

And in two weeks, we're taking his precious binkie away for good; cold turkey. I'm strategically planning to do it on a weekend so Nathan can help me when B has his meltdowns. My good friend Laurie suggested that I replace it with something else that can comfort him. I thought that was a good idea. At least till he overcomes his binkie fetish. Who knows, he could be fine in a couple of days. I'm just expecting the worse.

Easter is this weekend and I haven't started getting B a basket or an outfit. I haven't prioritized it since he's too young for candy. But friends have suggested I could do books or toys. I don't know, I just hate feeling the pressure of having to do it because it's his first Easter. I'll most likely go to the Mall tomorrow to get him an outfit.

Here are some recent pictures of Brayden:

Spring has Sprung!

2009-03-21T17:58:00.000-07:00

Nine months have passed since his birth and I can't believe we're 3 months away from him turning a year old! His personality continues to develop and Nathan and I see a humorous and curious child coming to life. He's still fascinated with hands. He laughs and coo's whenever I snap my fingers or do the "itsy-bitsy spider" song with him. Brayden now sways side to side and can now clap his hands whenever I sing to him. I often wonder if the loud pitches of ooOooo's and aaaahhh's are him singing too. He makes funny noises with his nose and often showers anyone with raspberries.

He sits up by himself now but is having difficulty crawling. But her certainly doesn't have a problem standing when he holds my fingers. There were several times he actually stood up by himself or held himself up on a toy for 10 seconds or more at a time. So who knows. He might be walking before he crawls.

I've recently started feeding him table food. He's had raviolis with pasta sauce and lentils with ground beef and veggies. He's been eating "baby food" since he turned 5 months old, but now I'm experimenting with how well he does with the meals I cook for Nathan and I. He eats anything I put in front of him. I give him yogurt with some pureed fruit, hummus, and he even had his first taste of cake at a birthday party for his friend Teddy.

Brayden now has 4 teeth with two more right on the surface. His face is now looking more and more like a little boy. Just a couple of days ago, I enrolled him into a Mommy and Me swimming class. It's indoors at the Boys and Girls Club. He'll learn how to blow bubbles, splash the water, do on the baby water slide and even get to go underwater! Watch out Michael Phelps!

The pregnancy is going well minus the pure exhaustion I feel every day and the excruciating headaches I get almost everyday. I'm 13 weeks along now and I'm showing. You know you're in the thick of it when you sweat at night and you fill your cup with ice to get your drink as cold as possible. I'm also having some muscle cramps. My next appointment is this upcoming Thursday and that's when I finally see my OB/GYN doctor. I'm curious to know if I'd be able to have a V-BAC so soon after having Brayden by C-Section.

I can't wait to find out what we're having. I'd be lying to you all if I said I didn't care what I was having. I'd love a girl, if not, I won't be bummed out. It just means we'll have 3 kids ;-) I have a feeling that I'm having a boy. I just get the feeling that I'm destined to have boys. I'll most likely find out in about 5 weeks or so.

Pregnant with Baby #2

2009-03-07T09:03:00.000-08:00

Although most of you who know me already know it, I'm officially announcing my pregnancy on my blog. It came as a surprise and shock to find out too. All I kept thinking was how hard it's going to be having a one year old and an infant all day long. But obviously the good Lord knew I'd be alright and that I'd do just fine. I'm 11 almost 12 weeks along now and the major symptoms I have now is complete exhaustion and really bad headaches. I also have no desire for coffee which when I was pregnant with Brayden, wasn't the case. I don't even miss it. The sheer odor of it is enough to send me to the bathroom.

Brayden is getting cuter by the day. He's learned to clap his hands, sing (in his own special language), and say the word "up." He's also going to bed earlier now at around 8:00pm and waking up at 8am. Not bad, not bad. Some of the things I'm trying to help him with or teach him, is to start crawling and picking up finger foods and feeding himself. I have a feeling he thinks the cubed carrots are toys he can grasp in his fists, then forget about them. He's turning 9 months old on the 19th!

We're in our new home and have been here since the end of January. We love all the open space and the extra bedroom. Not to mention the beautiful kitchen we have and the cathedral ceiling downstairs. Perfect timing with baby #2 coming in September.

For my sister and family in Maine

2009-02-17T18:38:00.000-08:00

Today I fed Brayden rice and beans for the first time. It was his introduction to the cuisine better get use to. Latin food. He gagged the first spoonful, but then quickly adjusted and actually liked it.
My sister when she was a baby made this breathe in and out noise with her nose and now Brayden does it. I got him to do it a few times. I also asked him to say, "I love you" and I could have sworn I heard Brayden say it. You'll have to hear it and be the judge. Brayden's also has a third tooth coming in on the top. It's the incisor left of where the top middle teeth come in. So he looks like a little hill Billy, but a very cute one. Believe it or not he's turning 8 months old tomorrow. WOW!

Rollin' with my Homies

2009-01-22T19:08:00.000-08:00

I got to witness Brayden rolling over for the first time last night! After having the pediatrician recommend that Brayden start Early Intervention because he wasn't rolling over yet or sitting up alone I felt like a failure as a mom. I know I shouldn't have felt that way, looking back on it now, but it was the first time I was defensive for my son.

Nathan told me that the night before last, he rolled over but I wasn't there to witness it so it didn't count ;-P After seeing how excited Brayden was to roll over, my heart welled up with so much pride for him. Changing a diaper will become so much more exciting now! He'll twist and turn as I attempt to strap on the diaper. FUN (I'm hoping you sense my sarcasm...)!

About 2 hours ago, I put Brayden down for the night. An hour after that I heard him wincing and fussing and thought that maybe he just lost his binkie. So I let him fuss to see if he'd fall back to sleep. Well he didn't stop so I checked on him and low and behold he was flat on his face! Now I'll be paranoid that he'll end up on his stomach in the middle of the night. Eek. But I guess he'll start fussing again and I'll hear him.

Congrats Brayden! Mommy and Daddy are very proud of you. You did it all by yourself!

Toofies

2009-01-13T18:10:00.000-08:00

My baby boy has two toofies! Yay! We've seen it coming now for about a month but 2-3 weeks ago we saw what seemed to be a white dot just below his gums. My sister predicted that he's get his tooth a week after she saw him and she was right.

Now as a proud mama I blasted his poor face with tons of flashes from the camera to capture them. I stuck my finger in his mouth to pull down that bottom lip and all he could do what stick out his tongue. I DID manage to get a few non-blurry ones. You'll have to excuse the green spooge on the side of his mouth. He had just finished eating dinner. Here they are:

Yesterday he had his 6 month check-up and they told me he is as long as an average one year old. His head circumference was also off the charts. Big head like mama!

The downer for me at this appointment was when the Doctor recommended that if Brayden wasn't sitting up without support or rolling over in three weeks, I'd need to set up an appointment with Early Intervention. I told her that if I put him on his stomach, he can roll over onto his back, but he doesn't do it from his back to his belly. He also needs me to support his hips when he sits up. I sit behind him because if I don't he falls back. He has been getting better with balance.

I must admit I felt sad, offended and angry that my almost 7 month old son was already being evaluated for milestones that differ from child to child. I began to question my parenting, but then a good friend reassured me that he's OK and that a parent cannot teach a child to crawl, sit, etc. They do it on their own at their own time. The other side of me didn't want to be an arrogant first time mother.

What I care about mostly is that my son IS happy and healthy. And he seems to be thriving in those areas. I will keep my mind open to suggestions from the doctors but I also need to not doubt in myself as a parent.

Happy New Year!

2009-01-04T12:16:00.000-08:00

With 2008 behind us we started 2009 with a bang. Brayden had a stomach bug which caused 24 hours of vomiting. I got sick with a cold that day so that canceled our plans for going out that night. We ended up in our jammies and ordered some sushi which I didn't mind especially with the crappy weather outside. The next day (Jan.2) we had to go out to buy some formula and we decided to go out to eat afterward.

The food was really great. Not so much a few hours later. Nathan ended up with a violent case of food poisoning. It was the worst I had ever seen (I'll spare you the details and you'll thank me for it). We spent all night scrubbing our carpets while trying not to wake Brayden up. We were literally out of commission for 2 days. My mother had to pick Brayden up and take him overnight. We're somewhat recovered now minus my cold still lingering but I'll tell you one thing, we won't be eating red meat for a long time! So that's how we spent our new year. Woohoo!

Despite all the early drama in the new year, Nathan and I managed to come up with goals for the new year. Since Nathan's goal last year seemed like it was "Always Late in 2008," he's made his New Year's resolution this year, "On time in 2009." Mine is a biggie. I've been really bad about bad-mouthing my husband and complaining to others about his short-comings. So much so that it's really affected Nathan. I feel terrible about it and so my goal towards him is "Be Kind in 2009." I need to focus more on what he does that I appreciate than magnify his short-comings. Just keepin' it real ya'll. I'm sure we can come up with more goals, but these are big ones for us that I know will help solidify our marriage.

Our 4 Christmases

2008-12-28T19:23:00.000-08:00

Too much to type at 10:24PM so I'll just give you an abridged version. We spent our first Christmas celebration at Pamma's house in Boston and had a lovely dinner. The table was set as only Pam could do; with love and thoughtfulness.

The next day we headed over to Nana and Papa's house and had our second Christmas with the family. He had decorated the house with 14 Christmas trees (yes, I said 14) and all the tasteful Christmas decor you could imagine. We also had a wonderful dinner followed by opening of gifts. Mike got Nathan and I Snuggies. I love him more for it too. LOL!! What a sense of humor, and yes, as soon as we got home we put them on and watched a few episodes of "The Office" DVD that I got for a gift.

Our 3rd Christmas was celebrated at home on Christmas day. It was so nice to be able to stay in our PJ's and open gifts with Brayden. We didn't get him much since we predicted he'd get lots of gifts. His fun was opening any gift and playing with the wrapping paper. I had m mother over for dinner and got to take some much-needed pictures of her with Brayden. The first pictures of them together. My mom HATES (I repeat, hates) her picture taken, but I think these pictures of her with B are wonerful! I made a roasted chicken with yams and a green bean casserole followed by a Ginger-Pumpkin Cheesecake.

Lastly, we went to Maine this weekend to visit my sister, her boyfriend and our nieces to celebrate Christmas with them. The last time I saw my sister and her family was 4 months ago when my niece Nikki celebrated her birthday in August. We had missed them so much it hurt. I could not believe how much our nieces grew and I was especially surprised to see my oldest niece turn into a beautiful swan as she celebrated her 12th birthday. We took them all to a bowling alley to celebrate her birthday and we asked her to invited a few of her closest friends.

We had so much fun with them. We also had a first... Brayden had his first stay-over at my sister's house! I thought I'd be much more anxious about it than I actually was. Maybe it's because my sister has 3 kids and is a seasoned parent, or maybe it's because I was so tired that I was looking forward to sleeping. Brayden did really well with them and my sister got to spend some much needed time with B.

Santa was very good to me but spending time with our families was even better. Now it's time to take down the tree which I'm NOT looking forward to. Especially unraveling the lights. Ugh, but I guess it's worth it right?! And so's the sweeping of a gagillion pine needles when trying to take it out of the house.

Recent Videos

2008-12-17T09:36:00.000-08:00

The first one was from yesterday when I took Brayden to the park. Two days ago my friend Laurie and I took our boys to a local park. I thought I'd try putting Brayden in a swing. Well he loved it so much he was laughing out loud most of the time. What stinks is that I didn't have my camera on me. So I thought I'd reenact the whole thing, except this time Brayden didn't laugh out loud. Probably because he was focused on how cold it was outside.

Second one's a funny clip. I was feeding Brayden Apples for the first time and he was just in one of those silly moods. He's been a really good eater by the way. So far he's tried Apples, Pears, Peaches, Acorn Squash, Butternut Squash Sweet Potato and Peas. The only one food he did make funny faces to the taste were the Peaches.

We got our Tree! Yipeeeee!

2008-12-14T15:33:00.000-08:00

And what a perfect day to get one too. It was so nice out. We took Brayden who was passed out in the back seat to go and buy our Christmas Tree. I of course woke him up because I wanted him to be a part of the whole experience. Hey, it's his First Christmas Tree and Mommy's a little emotional, gimme a break! ;-)

He was a good sport though, I gotta give it to him. If someone woke me up from a nap, I'd be breathing fire upon them. Brayden was fascinated with the trees. More so with the guy and his chainsaw. We could not get him to look at the camera for some family shots but we got them nonetheless!

As soon as we got home, we unpacked our ornaments and went right to work. Mind you, Brayden was woken up from his nap by yours truly and he hasn't gone back to his nap. Yet we were able to take a few pictures of him helping us put up some ornaments.

Here's a little video clip giving you a peek at our Christmas tree, Brayden and for those curious, his room. Some of you were curious as to how we managed to create his bedroom out of our dining area. We made it work, but as you can tell babies fill up a home very quickly!

NY & NJ Trip

2008-12-10T07:42:00.000-08:00

This past weekend we packed out bags and headed down to NY and NJ. My dear friend Melissa and her husband Dan live in a farmhouse in NY and had invited us down for a couple of nights. The last time I saw her was at one of her wedding receptions here in Boston last October. Gosh I missed her. That's one part that sucks about growing up, one never really stays in one place.

Anyhow, I digress...Melissa and Dan made every effort to make sure we had a relaxing time in their home. She has a jacuzzi tub in the guest bathroom and let me just tell you I took a bath every chance I could get! We also sat by the fireplace and enjoyed some much needed girl talk. Brayden was such a good boy the whole time too. We got out for a nice walk then went out to lunch for Pizza and a Blood Orange Martini (hella good too!).

After a couple of nights there we drove down to see my family in NJ. We got to my Aunt Mary's house and were warmly welcomed by most of my family. And that's quite impressive seeing that there's 3 uncles and their wives, and my 2 aunts and their spouses along with 12 cousins and 2 second cousins. And of course my lovely and lively Nana who constantly amazes me with her energy and youthful personality.

It was so nice to see mostly everyone there and seeing my cousin Kevin whom I haven't seen in years was a bonus. My aunts worked really hard to get everyone together and cook lots of wonderful food and desserts. After spending a day with them we felt that it was necessary to go back down maybe in the Spring and visit again but for a little longer.

Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree

2008-12-04T20:01:00.000-08:00

Tonight, I took Brayden into Boston to witness his first Christmas Tree lighting. It's the mother of all trees and one that is one cool "first" Christmas Tree sighting. We went to the Boston Common where I'd say a few thousand people came to celebrate the beginning of all Christmas festivities. My sister in law Sarah, came to join me.

She helped find the perfect spot for us to stand where we can see the performances and tree at the same time. The weather held up pretty nicely and the crowd was pretty controlled. As soon as we heard the countdown, Brayden was looking behind him at the crowd yelling "5-4-3-2-1" while I was trying to get him to look forward towards the tree so he could see it being lit. As soon as it was lit, there were some fireworks which caught his attention and then he was totally glued.

Not sure why "Dummy Park Ranger" decided to wear a reflective coat cause he's in MOST of our pictures. It kind of looks like a HUGE Neon Green Glow Alien right smack in the middle of almost perfect photos. Oh well. I guess Sarah and I could have shouted over, "Hey you, Park Ranger with the obnoxious reflective jacket...can you move over please?!"

Afterwards, we met up with Pamma at the Taj Hotel and took some pictures of the biggest Ginger Bread house I had ever seen.

I seriously got a little teary-eyed tonight when I saw Brayden's eyes light up when he was watching the fireworks and Christmas tree. Maybe because this time last year I thought I was only a month pregnant and thought I was going through another miscarriage only to find out I was 3 months pregnant with a little miracle inside of me. And now here he was, in my arms turning his head every which way taking in everything, and there I was a very happy mommy. I'm sure he won't remember the first Christmas tree he ever saw, but I certainly will.

A Very Happy Thanksgiving

2008-11-30T10:47:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving was such a great day. My Father in law and his wife hosted it at their home. Everything was so beautiful and festive. I seriously need to take notes on decor because it literally looked like it all came out of a Martha Stewart photo shoot! The whole gang Manno/Maugel/Giaimo crew was there along with Nathan's mom. Brent said a beautiful prayer to start us off for the day. He encouraged us to take the torch that will be passed onto us, the children to keep with the traditions of the Holidays.

Brayden got to hold the Turkey Drumstick with Papa. Here are some pictures from the day. One of them is a picture of Justin and Evan giving Brayden kisses. They love him so much. Then to end the night, we sat outside around a bonfire. It was all so relaxing and quite memorable.

Happy 5 Months Old

2008-11-23T13:43:00.000-08:00

Brayden is still sick, but it's now at the tail end of things. He's got the crusty boogies around the opening of his nostrils and a juicy cough in the morning. Despite it all, he still manages to be very happy. He turned 5 months old this past week.

He had his 3 round of shots and check-up at the doctors office. He's now 18.12 pounds and 27 1/2 inches tall. I asked the nurse practitioner about starting solids since Brayden has shown interest when I eat. Based on how Brayden is doing she thought it was a good time to start him on Rice Cereal.

This afternoon, I put his high-chair together and made him a serving of Rice cereal. I'll let the video tell you how it went:

My Baby Boy is Sick :-(

2008-11-17T18:11:00.000-08:00

It all started on Saturday night when Brayden was sitting in his bouncy chair. He made a sound as if he were choking on something so I picked him up, whacked his back a few times and he spit up some yucky flem. I didn't think much of it but then he woke up at 1am, then 3am, then 7am. All 3 times he threw up and couldn't hold down more than 2 ounces of formula.

I tried to feed him again and e trew up a bunch of mucus and started crying. That's when I knew he was sick. The nurse told me that all of his symptoms sounded like he had a cold. He doesn't have a high fever, but I can tell he's fighting one. He's surprisingly still manages to crack a smile and laugh here and there. He's got that red-eye glazed look with lots of wet snot dripping from his nose and into his mouth. And now he's developing a cough. :-(

It makes me sad that he's not feeling well. It's bound to happen though. It's that time of the year and I know lots of people who are currently sick. Here are some pictures of Brayden "sick."

The Importance of Family

2008-11-10T11:44:00.000-08:00

Growing up, I always had the security of being cared for by my mother, who raised both my sister and I. Now as an adult having a child myself, I'm realizing just how important it is that our son be surrounded by family. Luckily for us, most of our family is within driving distance. Just this past weekend, Pam's parents, Rod and Nancy came to visit us from Ohio. It was the first time they got to meet their great-grandson.
They taught Brayden the "stand up, sit down" game like they've done to their children and grandchildren. And Papa made Brayden laugh out loud with his silliness. (Check out the video at the end).
A few weeks ago, Brayden got to also meet Pam's Ancle and Aunt Bob and Peggy down in Connecticut. They were so hospitable and loving during our stay with them. And in December we're planning on visiting my side of the family so Brayden can meet his great-nani in New Jersey, along with his great aunts and uncles.
Each family member represents an individual thread that weaves a rope that's strong, and filled with joy and love. Each thread holds a unique gift and knowledge that helps to raise us all. I hope and pray that as Brayden grows up, he will never take for granted the love, knowledge and wisdom that each family member posesses. And I hope that as a parent I can pass down the traditions that both Nathan and I grew up with that helped to shape who we are and show us the importance that family brings.
Here are some recent pictures. Some are random cute ones and some are with family:

Rockin' the Vote 08

2008-11-04T16:30:00.000-08:00

This morning, Brayden and I walked over to our precinct to vote. It was such a beautiful day out and we had no lines to wait in which made it even more pleasant. I'm grateful to be a part of such a historical day where we'll either have a Black President, or a female Vice President.

The turn out rate for votes are going to hit ground-breaking records too! This election has brought about a lot of emotions and controversy and I can honestly say that I'm glad it's over. It seems like this election started way too early. Anyhow, based on the color we wore, I'll let you guess who we voted for ;-). I understand we're in the minority here in Massachusetts, but it still felt empowering to vote!

God Bless the U.S.A!

Brayden's 1st Laugh

2008-11-02T20:03:00.000-08:00

I was changing his diaper when I asked hm if he did a "stinky." Then I asked him, "Are you stinky?" Apparently he found that funny so I went along with the joke. This was his first out loud laugh. Luckily we caught it on film.

Happy, or not so Happy Halloween!

2008-10-26T19:18:00.001-07:00

Let me preface this by saying that I thought the Penguin costume was adorable. Brayden on the other hand doesn't seem to think so..........

He might have been tired. He might have been hot. Maybe he wasn't feeling the whole "one-piece-suit" situation. So I do what any mother would do for a screaming baby...get the binkie.

WHEW, much better. He didn't last long in this body bag of sweltering heat. Just enough for the family to go goo-goo-gaah-gaah over him, then I took it off.

Here are some more pictures that I took throughout the day. Auntie Sarah had a chance to hang out with him and so did Nana. We were at a Birthday party for 9 kids in Nana's Family. Let's just say the adults were out numbered, but the kids had such a great time!

Personality

2008-10-24T14:25:00.000-07:00

Brayden's personality is really coming out. He seems to be easily excitable and loves to interact with people. I can already tell that he's going to be an active child (pray for me please) by the way he's starting to aggressively grab his toys. Also, he LOVES it when I stand him up on his feet. He whips his head around and scans any room we're in.

Here are some recent pictures of us. We had waaaaay too much fun with these Sunglasses that my sister gave Brayden for my baby shower. At first, he does this Stevie Wonder head wiggle, then he adjusts to having them on his face and all is fine. We then put a white cap on his head and thought he looked like our Mexican Chicano Baby!

Brayden Talks!

2008-10-18T15:01:00.000-07:00

So the other night, I was making some home made Beef and Barley soup (which by the way was DIVINE). When all of a sudden Brayden breaks out into a conversation with me. This wasn't just cooing, it was a little more than that. It was as if he found his voice and started experimenting with moving his mouth and lips in different ways to make different sounds. Check this video out and see for yourself. He turns 4 months old tomorrow can you believe it?!

BTW, stay tuned this week cause I'm putting Brayden's Halloween costume on him and taking pictures. ;-P

Brayden's Christmas Wishlist

2008-10-14T05:43:00.000-07:00

Let's be honest here and say it's Mommy's wish list for Brayden ;-). I've already been asked by family members as to what they should get Brayden for Christmas. WARNING: This list will grow.
I'm really in love with all wooden toys. Probably because they're natural and safe without the use of paint or coloring that could chip off. Also because they don't require batteries and they're biodegradable. Here are some websites that I really love that contain many wooden toys:
Anything from (Natural Baby Toys) ThreeSistersToys.com
OompaToys.com
ImagiPlay.com
FineWoodenToys.com

Elephant Rattle by Imagiplay

Wooden Roller by Parent's Choice Foundation

Colorful Stacking Cubes by Haba

Croo-ak by Haba

Rockabye Baby- Lullaby Renditions of The Rolling Stones by Baby Rock (something mommy can enjoy too)

Baby Animals Black and White by Phyllis Tildes

Winkel by Manhattan Toy

My big boy

2008-10-02T19:09:00.000-07:00

My baby boy is not so small anymore. He's growing fast and is now 15 pounds. He's now 3 1/2 months old now and we are starting to see his personality come out. Tomorrow, we go to the mall to get his pictures taken. I'm planning on putting his Patriots outfit on which I think represents our little family of Sports loving people. Hopefully he'll be as passionate as we are about our teams.

I'm starting to really enjoy being a mom now that Brayden and I have somewhat of a dialog. He smiles at my funny faces and "responds" to my question of "Sooo Brayden what do you want to do today?" He and I understand each other as a mother and child do. When his eye lids turn pink, I knows he's tired. When he yawns more than once in a minute, he's bored. When he kicks his legs he want to get up and go.

One of my favorite parts of the day is in the morning when he wakes up for the day. We hear him talking to himself in his crib. Squeeling, screatching, moaning and oooOOoing. I think to myself, "Who is he talking to and how does he stay so entertained for so long?" I get up and walk over to his crib and when he notices that I'm there, he gives me the biggest smile and I completely melt.

The Great Debate

2008-09-23T19:20:00.001-07:00

Ever since Brayden was born, it's been an ongoing discussion among our family, friends and each other. Who does Brayden look like? The doctor could have given us any boy at the hospital and we would have never known any differently. Brayden has my dark hair and big head along with the round face. But he also has his dad's blue eyes (although Brayden's are a darker shade of blue), his hair line and he also has Nathan's hands and feet.

Some say Brayden looks like me and some say he looks like Nathan. I guess he's one of those kids who won't look like anyone in particular, till he's older. I'm just glad that no one confuses him for a girl.

Brayden's now 3 months old and doing so well. He can hold up his head for a long time. I get to swing him around the house on my hip and he somehow does fine with that. He's starting to develop a sleeping pattern and goes to bed anywhere between 9-10pm and then wakes up at around 4:40am for a feeding. Then goes back down, then wakes up at 7:30-8:00. Then I bring him into bed with us for another 2 hours. (Please excuse the glamorous sleeping pose and nightgown)

We then get up and I feed him, then we play on his Baby Einstein Mat which he loves. He talks to Mr. Sun who lights up and plays music. He likes to lift up both of his legs to kick the toys that hang from the mat. He once did that and ended up on his side. Tummy time is getting better. At first he didn't like it much, but I've been making it a habit to get him on his tummy twice a day because I guess it helps with crawling.

Yesterday was Nathan's 29th Birthday. I was feeling ambitious and decided to make him a birthday meal and cake. Here's what was on the menu:

Garlic & Foccachia bread with a homemade dipping oil (rosemary and garlic)
Fresh Tomato & Mozzarella Salad with chopped basil sitting on top of Balsamic Vinaigrette and Olive Oil
Top Sirloin Steaks rubbed in cracked Pepper and Salt pan-cooked in Butter
Roasted Acorn Squash with Maple Syrup, Brown Sugar and Butter

And for his Birthday cake, I made a Chocolate Mousse Cake with Whipped Cream Cheese Frosting decorated with fresh raspberries. AND a bottle of Shiraz. WHEW! I've got the recipes if you're feeling inspired ;-) Brayden was a little needy, so I brought him into the kitchen with me in his bouncy chair and occupied him with my silly songs and spontaneous tickling.

Nathan seemed to be really happy with the meal and cake. It was nice to stay home and not pay a crap load of money to go out. PLUS we had extra's for today and a ton of cake left for those late night cravings. Chocolate Mousse Cake anyone?

And now I leave you with the photo of the month:

Lessons I've Learned For Far- part deux

2008-09-16T16:49:00.000-07:00

Don't buy a Boppy pillow for breastfeeding unless your boobs hang as far south as the Carolinas. I've had to prop up the Boppy with other pillows, completely defeating the purpose of buying it in the first place.

Never wear black unless you're planning on not holding your child for a day. Wear colors such as off white, pea green and mustard yellow and you'll do just fine.

If it takes you an hour to get ready to go anywhere, tack on an extra hour. Just trust me on this one.

Pacifiers are a Godsend.

If your child seems like he/she has gas pain, don't hang him/her upsidedown. Instead, take their feet and lift them towards their chest. It pumps those farts out in no time!

Going for jogs or walks everyday actually give me more energy to wake up every 3-4 hours at night. How 'bout that?

Don't bother getting regular manicures. Your hands are in so much water that it's just pointless to expect your nails to stay chip/tear-free.

A quick and sure way to get off the phone with a chatty friend is to just tell them that your child needs your attention. Confession: I've only used my child in this way a handful of times. And I can't promise you that I'll never do it again, cause sometimes it's the only thing that works, LOL.

It's never too early to read to your child. Brayden (who is now 3 months old) will sit on my lap for at least a half an hour, listening to me read him his books. He pumps his hands and makes cooing noises. Which in baby language means, I like it, I like it!

DON'T remove any tags off of your baby's new clothes unless you know you're ready to use them. I have lots of clothes that Brayden didn't get a chance to wear because he's growing so fast.

Chick Magnet

2008-09-10T15:31:00.001-07:00

Read the shirt ladies. I'm a Chick Magnet. Uh huh. That's right. Have your peeps call my peeps.

Happy I'm Home

2008-09-06T05:42:00.000-07:00

This is what happens to daddy when he feeds Brayden too fast and wants to get out the door! I never laughed so hard when he sent me a text message with Brayden all dressed up, ready to go. Twenty minutes later, he sends me this picture texting, "Not so cute outfit anymore!" I wanted to die. I could just imagine Nathan taking 20 minutes to decide what clothes to put on Brayden. He's just so proud of his little boy and wants him to look cool. Well after taking care of Brayden during my last two days at work, I think he's found a new appreciation for how much it takes to get a kid out of the door! So much for leaving the house at noon LOL!

Well I'm home now. And it's been quite nice. I took one day to store all of his newborn clothes because he's just to big for them now, and replaced the drawers with his 0-3 and 3-6 month clothes. He has a lot of 6 mo-1 year clothes and didn't really have any 3-6 month clothes so I used our gift card and went on a shopping spree yesterday. I even bought him a Patriots oufit for when he watches the game with Papa and Daddy.

Brayden is so much more alert. He does this thing with his head. We call it the "Stevie Wonder." He shifts his head from left to right, trying to look at everything he can. I'm impressed with how he can focus on two people in the room now. If I'm holding him and Nathan's across the room and Brayden hears him, he'll look at me then look over to where Nathan is.

Our Labor Day weekend up in Maine was great! The weather held up nicely and Uncle Mitch took Brayden on his first fishing trip. Nathan and I went along and don't worry, we had an infant life jacket on board and uncle Mitch drove really slow. Mommy even caught a fish! See Brayden in the background? He slept most of the time ;-)

Which costume should I get Brayden?

2008-08-27T10:29:00.001-07:00

UPDATE:
I JUST ordered the Penguin costume! BTW, When I showed Nathan the options he replied, "Why can't he be something cool like a shark or a Lion?" My inner response was, cause he's subject to me forcing him into cutsie outfits and he's too young to be embarrassed. Plus, who wouldn't want to be a Penguin for Halloween anyways? ;-) And yes, I will post pictures and make Brayden wear the outfit for at least a week. That should torture daddy enough wouldn't you say?
**************

I know I'm a bit early on this but these are soooooooo cute! Help me pick one. It might be a toss-up between the monkey and Penguin. And I might go to Babies R Us to see if they have more of a selection. The Wonder Bread costume is from Babies R Us and the others are at Old Navy.
Here's Brayden:

And here are the costumes:

Starting to get fun!

2008-08-19T12:42:00.001-07:00

(pic. 1: Brayden talking to mommy)
(pic. 2: Brayden cracks a smile)

WHY didn't anyone tell me that the first 2 months are extremely difficult?! Not because I have a challenging baby, because I don't. He's actually quite perfect if you ask me ;-p. But because all the newness of being a fist-time mommy plus waking up every 2 1/2-3 hours can really do a number on your quality of sleep. Not to mention the mood you're in for most of the day because of it along with the unpredictable schedule infants have.

But just last week, Brayden started smiling at us!! And he's also started belting out a few shouts as to communicate with us!!! Which makes waking up at 4am a little more enjoyable. It's like he's now giving back to mommy who's taken such good care of him. Someone told me that having an infant's the closest you get to giving unconditional love. It never rang so true! It's because they can't say "Thank You Mommy" or give you a big hug for all that you do.

As of 4:19pm, he's now 2 months old. He's able to hold up his head for a long time and he also loves crawling up us when we have him on our chest. We're now experimenting by putting him in his crib istead of the pack n' play in our room. It's SOOOO tempting not to just keep him in bed with me. It would make things so much easier. One thing I don't know is when do they start developing a schedule? And when should I start establishing one?

I go back to work on Thursday but I won't be there for long. I've given them my notice. I'm officially retired at the ripe age of 31. At least with full-time work. I hope to continue freelance work and maybe get a part-time one day. The more Nathan and I thought about it all, we felt it was best for Brayden if I stayed home with him. Can we afford to do this? No. We're taking some loans out to support us for the next 2 years. Will it be worth it. YES! I can't imagine not being a part of or missing Brayden's developmental stages.

I in no way thing at-home-mothers have it easier. I think it's much harder to stay home. I know I'll look back and not regret it because you never get that time back. I just need to find creative and non-expensive ways to get out of the house with him. Get him involved with other kids and I can make new mommy friends.

Can I call it pergatory?

2008-08-04T06:17:00.001-07:00

I don't fit into any of my pre-pregnancy clothes and my maternity clothes are getting baggy! I'm stuck in the middle and have no idea how long it will take to get back into my regular clothes. I refuse to go shopping because (1) Don't really have the money. (2) I'll most likely lose the pregnancy weight or at least most of it.

I'm considering doing Weight Watchers because everyone I know who's on that program has been successful at losing weight in a healthy way. Plus it doesn't have an unrealistic plan or goals. I can eat what I want on a Point system. The hard part will be logging on daily to submit my meals and track everything. My goal is to lose 16 pounds with the goal of losing 2 pounds a week at the most. That way it's healthy, and steady. The key is to choose better foods since I am breastfeeding. And speaking of breastfeeding, my boobs feel like they're at least 2 pounds each so I'll have to take them into consideration when deciding what an ideal weight goal is, LOL!

My doctor gave me the OK to start working out but she did warn me not to do what I did pre-pregnancy, and to start off slow. She said that my body would know when I've over done it. Realistically, the only excercise I know I can do is to take Brayden out on the bike pathe in either the Bjorn and go for a walk or use the Jogger. I might invest in some resistance bands since they require very little storage space and they're effective for toning. AND I can do them while Brayden naps.

Wish me luck!

The "6-week" marker

2008-07-31T15:37:00.000-07:00

Lots of women talked to me about this "6th week" mark. A time when reality finally sets in, when sleep deprivation takes its toll and you either get the baby blues or just say to yourself, "OK...I'm DONE!"

Well, I must say that I'm definitely getting there. And I feel terrible saying it because Brayden IS a great baby. He's not Colic, he just cries when something's wrong. But even that can sometimes drive a woman crazy. I'm the one who gets up at night and feeds him, then spends all day with him so I feel like the life is being sucked out of me sometimes. He's gotten to the point where most times he just wants me to hold him and I'm fine with that, but then if I need to put him down to take a shower, grab something to eat, or put a load of laundry in, he screams bloody murder. And he's not old enough to know how to keep the binkie in his mouth so he spits it out, and I come to the rescue.

Just a few days ago I literally almost had a melt-down. I was feeling resentful and on the verge of tears when I asked Nathan to watch him while I went out for a drive. That day in particular, Brayden was really needy and I literally held him all day and fed him about every hour and a half to two hours. I needed a break. I drove around the area, stopped at BK and got me a Chocolate milkshake and a cookie. It was the best shake and cookie ever (at least at the time it felt like it).

I expressed to Nathan last night how I've been feeling and that I needed more help from him because I felt like I was doing it all myself and getting headaches and feeling really impatient. I didn't expect too much from him because I know he works during the day, but help me once in a while at night so I can catch up on rest. Well Nathan let me sleep from 10:30- 4:30am last night!!! And it certainly made a HUGE difference today.

I also learned a great trick today; use the Bjorn at home! I strapped him on and got to do a load of laundry, cook, clean and type this blog! PLUS it's a great workout. Woohoo. I'm starting to get the hang of this new mom thing. Another great idea (came from Nathan) is putting Brayden in the bouncy chair and bringing him in the bathroom with me so I can take a shower. So far, so good. He seems to like the sound of the shower (thank GOD).

Yesterday we went to Brayden's one month check-up and discovered that he weighs a little over 11 pounds, woah. I KNEW he was eating a lot. I love looking at his dimples on his elbows and his fingers. My boy's filling in for sure. His eyes are so blue. I know it's too soon to declare it but I'm telling you, his eyes will be blue.

He's also more aware of his surroundings. He follows my voice and has already smirked a few times. He follows the rattle when I shake it in front of him and move it side to side. It's wonderful to think that very soon, he will be responding back to me with laughter and smiles. I can't wait.

Breastfeeding is also getting better, not perfect but better. I still get sore and have to sometimes supplement with formula, but I refuse to give up. I bought a bottle of Fenugreek (a natural herb) yesterday to help with increasing the production of milk. My milk production had seemed to be decreasing and that's not good when your child's appetite is increasing so I read up on Fenugreek and it had nothing but good results for many women. In fact I met with a lactation specialist today and she had recommended that I take it as well. Fun fact about it is that it makes your milk smell like maple syrup...yummmmyyy!!!!!

Onto some eye-candy:

Week 3- Lessons learned so far

2008-07-16T18:37:00.000-07:00

(My nieces came to visit Brayden this past weekend)

Whew!
Being a parent is no joke. I've already learned some things about this new phase in our lives.

1. Never say "Never." I told myself that I'd "Never" use Formula, strictly Breast Milk. THat was until Brayden sucked me dry last week and all of a sudden had some growth spurt that caused me to buckle and get some Similac and add it to the breast milk. Breast feeding has still been challanging. Now I can understand why lots of women give up on it. It's laborious. And when your child chomps on your nipple, you litterally feel like someone took a nail clipper and snipped the tip off (OUCH!!! I know, but I needed to give you something to compare it to.) Then after the pain and I finally rip him off, my nipple looks like a pressed Panini!

Another "Never" I buckled to was "The Binkie." Yes the pacifier. I vowed to never use it because I felt that it might cause my child to be dependant on it. Plus they (books I've read) say that it's bad for mothers who are trying to breast feed. Well that flew out the window when I woke up many times to Brayden crying as if he was being murdered. And warming a bottle or trying to get him to latch takes a while.

He's also puked many times when I thought he was still hungry and ended up projectile vomiting. Was he full and just wanted to be pacified? I don't know. But I remember walking down the isle of Target where the "Binkies" were displayed, and really struggled with the decision. I now use it when I'm warming up a bottle. But I've also used it when I've needed a break from him and need to eat myself.

2. Just because he cries doesn't mean he's hungry. I've had one too many projectile vomiting episodes to learn this valuable lesson. I now know to pick him up, sing to him, bounce him, talk to him, and/or change his diaper. Most of the time if nothing else works, he's usually hungry, or he just wants me to get up and walk around with him.

3. Sleep when he sleeps. It took me a while to learn this valuable lesson (yes, I'm stubborn as a mule, ask Nathan). I now take naps once during the day when Brayden falls asleep. It definitely helps when I have to take over baby duty after Nathan's shift at 2a.m.

4. Snack whenever you can. Cause eating a nice warm meal just won't happen unless someone's helping you. I have my fridge stocked with yogurt, cheese sticks, fruit. Cubbards stocked with Cheezits, chocolate animal crackers, instant oatmeal and applesauce.

This list will grow to infinite numbers I'm sure. :-)

Settling In

2008-07-08T11:17:00.000-07:00

It's been about 3 weeks since Brayden's birth and I must say that I'm enjoying every moment I spend with him. Well except when he goes on feeding clusters every 1/2 hour to 45 minutes when I can't seem to keep up with his milk demands. ;-)

The first couple of weeks I swear I was running on some sort of adrenaline or something cause I didn't feel tired even when I didn't sleep much. Now that things are starting to settle in, my sleep deprivation is finally catching up with me.

I'm still trying to breastfeed him, but sometimes he doesn't latch so I end up pumping for about 20 minutes. Here's how the feedings happen about every 2-3 hours (unless he's cluster-feeding):

Attempt to breastfeed for about 15 minutes.
If he latches, great! If not, I warm up a bottle of pumped milk.
After he eats, I change his diaper.
Get him to be content or fall back to sleep.
Pump for about 20 minutes, store and clean bottles and pump accessories.
Then I go to my journal and document how much he ate and how much I pumped.

All of this takes approximately an hour.

When all is done, I go to bed and get ready to wake up in another couple of hours and do the same thing all over again. Of course it would be much easier if he latched all the time, but the reality is that he doesn't and I just do what I need to do to ensure he gets breast milk.

This past week, he's increased the amount of how much he eats. So much so that I couldn't keep up with him and have had to feed him half breast milk and half formula. Made me kinda sad, don't know why. He's grown significantly. In just 5 days, he gained 7 ounces!

Brayden's umbilical cord fell off when he was two weeks old. And no, I'm not keeping it; that's gross! But it made me realize that it was the last thing that connected him to me in the womb, and that time is passing! I gave him his first bath last week and it seemed like he enjoyed it. Except the part when he had to get out into the cold air and get dried off.

One thing I'm enjoying is hearing Brayden make some really funny noises. When he's hungry, he oinks. When he's coming out of sleep, he makes Flipper noises (dolphin). And when I'm walking him on the bike path in the Bjorn he continuously grunts. Another thing I enjoy is when we lock eyes when I hold him and talk to him. He knows my voice.

Brayden has certainly traveled more than the average infant. When he was a week old, we went down to the Cape to visit Nathan's family from Ohio.

Then this past week, we went up to Maine for the 4th of July weekend to spend time with Pammy and Poppy. He even got to go on a boat ride and join us at the fire pit to make S'mores!

This upcoming weekend my sister and nieces will be visiting for the weekend and I can't wait! We're having a BBQ out back and spending some family time. I appreciate that my sister makes an effort to come and see us. I know it's not easy.

Many thanks to my friends Trisha, Esther, Yoshi, Ryan and Amy for stoppying by and bringing us food, Propel, stamps and anything else we've needed. My mom and Nathan's mom have also visited us and have brought dinner. It certainly helps to have friends and family nearby!

Happy Birthday Brayden!

2008-06-23T21:06:00.001-07:00

Nathan and I are excited to announce the birth of our son, Brayden Lewis Maugel. Born on June 19th at 4:18pm, weighing in at 8 pounds, 7 ounces and measuring in at 20 1/2 inches tall.

You'll have to forgive me for not getting this online sooner. As you could imagine between the doctor's visits to our room every 20 minutes, feeding, pumping, changing, visitors, cat naps, etc. I literally never got to look at a computer.

The whole birth experience was really overwhelming emaotionally, something I know we'll never ever forget. My C-Section time was pushed back due to some emergencies that came up with other couples after me who needed my doctor's time, so we waited about 4 hours for my turn to go in. As we waited in the recovery room for my deli ticket number to be called, we heard a newborn crying behind the curtain next to ours and both Nathan and I cried, thinking about how our son will sound just like that. My number was called ;-) and I went in to get the epidural. Wowm talk about an awkward experience! I felt needles go in my back and my feet all of a sudden got really warm. Then I couldn't move my legs. I was strapped to the operating table and the rest is history!

We're now home. Nathan's taking a nap and I'm uploading all our pictures to share with family and friends and updating my blog while Brayden's fast asleep next to me. It's past midnight and I'm eating Sour Patch Kids and drinking lots of water.

I need to pump soon because my breast are rock hard! And persistance paid off! I have a new found respect for women who persevere through the agony of attempting to breast-feed. It's definitely one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. He's still having a hard time latching on so I'm sore but thank goodness my milk finally came in. It felt like it would take FOR-EVER! But I'm so glad I didn't give up as much as it hurts and takes away from my sleep, and is taxing on me physically.

You'll have to forgive me if I'm slow at updating the blog for a bit. Checking email and getting online is now a luxury for me. Both Nathan and I are working hard at being a team and helping each other through learning how to be parents.

As I finish this email, I'm looking over at Brayden and realizing how even his face changes day-to-day and how these precious moments will one day be a memory. He looks a lot like me and my side of the family (woot woot!) but I'm sure he will inherit all the amazing qualities that his father has.

Thank you all for your well wishes on my last blog. I appreciate and NEED your support and friendships. With love, Jen

Coming Soon to a Crib Near You

2008-06-13T11:12:00.000-07:00

I'm scheduled for a C-Section next Thursday, June 19th @ 2pm!!!

The doctors told me that because of his size, it poses some complications for natural delivery like shoulder dysplasia and chest compression. So I'm pretty much forced to have a C-Section. Which I don't mind if it saves our boy from being in trouble. It was the safest conclusion to potential complications. Plus, with having the scheduled C-Section, all the necessary doctors will be there ready for anything, and I'll have my doctor delivering him which is what I wanted.

I will be staying at the hospital from Thursday till Monday which is when we go home. We will do our best to keep you guys informed and updated with pictures of our Chunky Monkey.

Please keep Baby M in your thoughts and prayers. We want him to be able to breathe on his own, and come home on Monday!

This is all so VERY exciting for Nathan and I. We still have stuff to assemble at home so we will be busy doing that this weekend. My last day at work is today, so I'll be around next week, most likely forcing myself to rest, taking it easy and not going "Clean-the-Nest Crazy" till Thursday.

OoooKkkkk, I'm done now

2008-06-05T12:10:00.000-07:00

I hate to admit this because I feel like I'll sound like an ungrateful person, but being pregnant isn't fun anymore. There. I said it. An ungrateful-bloated pregnant woman at that. Yes you heard right bloated. I literally feel and look like the Michelin Tire Man. My feet are swollen sausage toes, my hands are so bloated that it almost hurts to make a fist.

All this happened literally within a week. From last week's weigh in, I've gained 6 pounds. Most of it I'm sure is water retention. And of course the weather's going to suck this weekend

(well at least for all the pregnant women out there)

with heat reaching up to 90 degrees and muggy.

I've also been having more than usual Braxton Hicks contractions. Last night, I wasn't even doing any hard work around the house. I started filling in Photo Albums with pictures (you know, the project you'll NEVER get to once you have a baby). I had my feet up, and was drinking plenty of water. Well I must have had about 10 of them in an hour. They didn't hurt, but there were a couple that made me feel a little nausea. Some lasted more than a minute too.

OK people, I'm asking for all-night vigils! LOL!!! Pray that I go within 2 weeks. Seriously. It's pretty pathetic when you're trying to put on your undies only to not be able to bend at the knees far enough to put your legs through only to topple over onto the dresser. Or when you've given up trying to dry the toes after a shower. Go ahead...laugh. I give you permission!

This weekend, we've got a lot going on, and I hope I have the energy to participate. If not, oh well. I can always resort to putting my feet up on a couch and scrap booking or reading a book.

Full Moon

2008-06-02T14:13:00.000-07:00

Are you blinded by the light yet? Nathan took this picture last night and I must admit, I didn't think I was this huge until I saw the pictures. Holy Moley!

Check out my beautiful Linea Nigra, I hear this won't go away till a year after I've given birth. Suuuper.

I'm now going into my 36th week of pregnancy. Hopefully I have only 2-3 weeks to go. I keep talking to the baby and telling him, "You know, anytime you wanna come out cause it's too crowded in there feel free to!"

Today I went to Boston to have some testing done and meet with the NICU department at the hospital I'll be delivering at. Testing was fine. All they did was monitor the baby's heartbeat and my contractions, and took some measurements of the baby. Everything was normal. The Pleural Effusion is still there, and thank God, it hasn't gotten worse. The High Risk doctor did say that I don't have to be induced if the fluid stays the same. Now if it gets worse or the fluid starts to settle in other areas of his organs, then getting induced is the way to go.

After the tests, we met with the NICU and asked every question imaginable. How long would he stay there if he couldn't breathe on his own when delivered? What happens if he comes out and can't breathe? What actions are taken? What happens if he's on the respirator and can't seem to breathe on his own? Are there any other procedures that can be done to remove the fluid? What are the risks? Will there be people in the delivery room on call in case?

A lot of these questions were unanswered because they won't know till he's born. One thing we do know, is that if when he's born and can't breathe on his own, they will take him to the NICU and put him on a respirator. Then what they do is take an X-ray of his lungs to see how they look. They slowly reduce the amount of Oxygen given to him to see if he's able to breathe on his own. If he can great! If he can't then they would most likely extract the fluid with a tube.

The time he'd stay there if this happened is unknown. What we know is that we're (the parents and limited family members) are welcome to come in 23 hours of the day to see him. We took a tour of the NICU and we saw so many tiny babies. It was so sweet, but I'm sure for the parents, it must be heart-wrenching to leave them there. The pediatricians were very optimistic and encouraged us to have the same mindset.

Here are the 3-D pictures of his face!

Can I complain for JUST a few minutes?

2008-05-29T06:09:00.000-07:00

Since I've been nothing but positive during this pregnancy, I feel I've earned a "Cathy Complainer" card. Don't get me wrong, I've been ecstatic with my pregnancy and at the fact that we were able to get pregnant so fast after our miscarriage last August. We're blessed to have a baby boy who's growing strong and has overcome so many obstacles and hasn't even been born yet. I've had so much support from our families, so much so, that it overwhelms me to think about how awesome of a family our son will have.

That all being said, I think I'm allowed to complain a smidgen about the difficult aspect of being pregnant, especially now that I'm in the home stretch with a few weeks to go.

I've given up on the art of having perfectly shaved legs.
I'm not particularly fond of the varicose veins I've developed that hurt when I stand up.
I wobble because I have a pinched sciatic nerve that shoots pain up and down my lower back and leg.
Mouth-breathing isn't particularly attractive, but it sure helps with the lack of oxygen I have due to how high my uterus is.
The "pregnant glow" that they talk about is nothing more than the accumulation of 50% more blood in your body that gives you the "blushed" look. But all that blood also rushes to your legs and hands causing your toes and fingers to look like little sausages.
As unlady-like as it is, spreading my legs as far as I can while sitting, actually feels quite nice.
Tossing and turning in bed's a real pain in the butt, especially when your trying to rearrange your pillows as you're having a contraction.
WHY is it that I wake up at random hours in the night and can't fall back asleep?
Making a salad at the salad bar at work has become an obstacle course. I just can't seem to reach those damn tongs without turning sideways, and sticking my head under the glass protector.
I can't go up a small flight of stairs or have a long conversation without breathing like I've just ran a marathon.

OK, I'm done complaining :-)

Happy Happy, Joy, Joy!

2008-05-19T13:40:00.000-07:00

Come sing along folks!

Nathan and I went to our (1 of 7) ultrasound appointment this afternoon, and they barely detected the Pleural Effusion!! Both the doctor and nurse thought I was a different patient because they had looked at previous scans in comparison to what they looked at today. As they were scanning his lungs Nathan and I were having a hard time finding the "black" areas (indicated as the fluid in previous scans) around his lungs. This was such a relief to see. There's still some but it literally looks like a sliver. The doctor told us that we might not have to see her once a week, but maybe every other. They still need to monitor him, but maybe not as much.

We prayed before our trip there and we also talked to Baby M everyday and told him to get those lungs healthy and get rid of the fluid. He listened! I'll have to remind myself to tell him one day of when he "obeyed" for the first time. You can only imagine the relief Nathan and I feel knowing that our baby boy is getting himself healthier.

I'll upload some more videos later on as well as a comparison picture for you to see the difference from previous scans with today's scans.

Another piece of information we got was that Baby M is now up to 6 1/2 pounds!

Today is a happy day!

Sooner than expected-Holy Cow

2008-05-16T10:45:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I had my first NST (Non-Stress Test) of many and met with my OB. Baby M seemed to be just fine as he rolled around inside so much causing nurses to stop by the room and remark at how much "noise he's making." I guess I should take that as a prelude of the things to come. Afterwards, I met with my OB, and she still seemed so puzzled at how both she and the high-risk OB cannot seem to peg the Plural Effusion to anything yet because everything else looks so good. I appreciated her honesty. More so because it gave me a brief sigh of relief knowing that he's in good condition.

I had a few questions for her that I needed answered in order to give my employer more solid answers as to when I'd need to go on Maternity Leave. I asked her if she thought my original due date of July 2nd was still as scheduled. She said, most likely not. She seems to think I will either go early naturally, or they will induce me 2-3 weeks before my original due date! I asked her why she thinks I need to go early and one is because of his condition, (whether it changes or not) and the other is his size. She measured me at 36 weeks along, even though I'm actually 33 weeks. She said I'd deliver a big baby, and I told her that I really wanted to deliver vaginally unless there were complications that would prevent me from doing so. (Lord grant me super pushing powers!)

She said that by 37 weeks I (and the baby) should be ready to go, so I should plan on letting my employer know that my maternity leave would begin the week of June 16th. Of course there's a buffer here, because there's no concrete date. We'll just need to play it by ear and by the findings with all the testing and scans I'll have with doctor's visits.

So since my "being pregnant" time had gotten shorter by 2-3 weeks I got home and had this sudden Super Woman urge to PURGE! I threw away more stuff I didn't think I had, uncluttered our filing cabinet to make room for a Baby M folder, and finalized my "What to pack for the Hospital List." Of course no later after that my mind went into the list of things that still need to be done or decided on before Baby M comes.

Here's our list:
-Deciding on a Pediatrician.
-Installing the Car Seat, setting up an appointment with local authorities to make sure it's properly installed.
-Purchase a Dresser. (The crib can wait, we plan on using the Pack 'n Play for now)
-Bring home all the baby items and clothes we need from the In-law's home so I can start washing the clothes and setting up our place.
-Have Nathan's dad come over (with his architectural eye) and give us rearranging input for our living room as to how we can fit a crib/dresser and baby stuff and still manage to have a make-shift living room. I call this process "Making 631 sq.ft. of living space work."
-Get rid of the love seat in the LR to make room for baby furniture.
-Get rid of or store all camping gear somewhere else to make room for baby stuff in our hallway closet.
-Purchase a Cam Corder to record my glorious moments of delivering a baby.
-Pack the Hospital bag and have it ready.

Stats:
Age of fetus: 33 weeks (measuring at 36 weeks)
What's going on this week: He's rapidly losing that wrinkled, alien look and his skeleton is hardening. The bones in his skull aren't fused together, which allows them to move and slightly overlap, thus making it easier for him to fit through the birth canal. (The pressure on the head during birth is so intense that many babies are born with a conehead-like appearance.) These bones don't entirely fuse until early adulthood, so they can grow as his brain and other tissue expands during infancy and childhood.

What's going on with Mommy: As your baby fills out even more of your belly, lots of things might start to change: Whereas before you were sashaying, you may find yourself waddling. Finding an easy position to sit in — let alone sleep — is becoming more of a challenge. And bumping into chairs and counters is par for the course.

You may be feeling some achiness and even numbness in your fingers, wrists, and hands. Like many other tissues in your body, those in your wrist can retain fluid, which can increase pressure in the carpal tunnel, a bony canal in your wrist. Nerves that run through this "tunnel" may end up pinched, creating numbness; tingling, shooting or burning pain; or a dull ache. Try wearing a splint to stabilize your wrist or propping your arm up with a pillow when you sleep. If your work requires repetitive hand movements (at a keyboard or on an assembly line, for instance), remember to stretch your hands when you take breaks — which should be frequently.

Baby's Size: This week your baby weighs a little over 4 pounds (heft a pineapple) and has passed the 17-inch mark. BUT according to the doctor he weighs 5 1/2 pounds.
Mood: Happy
Cravings: Raspberry Frozen Yogurt, Thousand Island Dressing, and Chow Mein crispy noodles.
Energy: Low, lots of lower back and hip pain.
Morning Sickness: NONE!!! But I now have heartburn and burp a lot.

33 weeks

2008-05-14T13:36:00.000-07:00

Here's an update on all the medical stuff that's happened this week. I spent all day Monday from 10:30am-7:00pm at Beth Israel Hospital. My OB called me at work in the morning and asked that I immediately go there to meet with a High-risk doctor. (Okaaay) She told me things over the phone that I had already known, but I wasn't sure why the rush. It panicked both Nathan and I and he came to my work to pick me up.

We went to the labor and delivery unit and I was asked to put on one of those gowns and lay in bed. A nurse (who was really sweet and helped me not feel so anxious) told me that the doctor I was there to see was in surgery all day and that I'd have to hang tight for her to have a break and then she'll come in and see me. We asked why we were there and they didn't know why. Apparently after my OB read my ultrasound results, she called the high-risk doctor at B.I. and scheduled a last minute appointment for me to see her and talk over results but also to run some tests on me and the baby.

Here's what happened in a nut-shell and what was discussed and done during our visit:
The fluid (or what's called a Plural Effusion) is still surrounding the baby's lungs. It hasn't gotten worse, it hasn't gotten better.

Possible Diagnosis:
It could be from a possible infection I have (they took blood samples from me and will run tests. Results will be back next week).

They ruled out that the baby has anemia by checking the blood flow in his brain. Which could have been a cause for the Plural Effusion.

It might become Chylous Thorax (defined as a leakage of lymphatic fluid from the lymphatic vessels). This is when the fluid spreads around his heart and stomach cavity, we're praying it won't. (Nathan can explain it better)

Lastly it could be any abnormalities such as Down's Syndrome or Neural Tube Defects. But according to my AFP Test, which came back negative for the abnormalities, this is most likely ruled out.

What happens now:
I'm now considered a "High-Risk pregnancy, "which means that they have to monitor me and the baby twice a week to check for an increase in fluid.
I have to go into Boston once a week for a biophysical ultrasound and
I have to go to my OB for a Non-stress test once a week as well.

I have to schedule an appointment with Children's Hospital so they can do a Fetal Echo scan on his heart.

I have to schedule an appointment with the NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) to go over what could happen after delivery.

I was given a steroid shot on Monday and one yesterday to mature his lungs more so if he went early, his lungs would be developed sooner.

What could happen:
Early Labor or potential C-Section if the fluid get worse meaning increases or spreads to the outside of his heart and stomach cavity (which is a possibility)

When born the baby might have a hard time breathing on his because the fluid would compress his lungs making it difficult for him to breathe on his own, which in that case, he'd be on a respirator, and get treatments in the NICU.

OR this Pleural Effusion can magically disappear (Which in some cases has).

I know this is overwhelming to read, it's overwhelming for Nathan and I to grasp. To help ease your mind, when they did do ultrasounds on Monday, he looked great and was very active (which is a very good sign!) They kept on telling me what a beautiful baby his is and how strong he was. All of his other organs and measurements are looking awesome. Most babies when they're in some type of distress or pain, are more lethargic or aren't as active. Not our son! And be relieved that we're receiving the BEST care in the best city! We're grateful that they are keeping a close watch the both of us.
*******************************
Onto some "oh how cute" news:
Nathan this morning heard the baby's heartbeat for the first time by placing his ear just over my belly button. Of course this made our day! He said it sounded like a choo-choo train.

Happy Mother's Day!

2008-05-10T16:51:00.000-07:00

I got this card in the mail this week. (Thanks for the tears Mom)

And this is what Nathan prepared for me the morning of: Nothing like a yummy plate of waffles, fresh cut fruit and Maple Syrup. He also got me tulips he stole from his campus garden because they gave him yet another parking ticket. Isn't he so sweet?! ;-)

Little mama is going to deliver a BIG baby

2008-05-10T08:08:00.000-07:00

Nathan and I went to our follow-up ultrasound in Boston yesterday afternoon to keep an eye on the fluid that was found outside the baby's lungs. It's still there and the nurse said that it looks like there might be a little more than last week so I'll need to have another ultrasound next week. We also need to set up an appointment with a "high-risk" OB to talk about what this all might mean if the fluid doesn't disappear before he's born. This might be something I need to go in for every week to monitor. Although last night Nathan spent hours online disecting what Chilothorax is and how babies get it. He read medical studies and journals that had a lot of promising outcomes when mothers were on a medium chain fat diet as well as giving the baby a few treatments once born. (If you want toknow what all that means, ask the chemist, not the artist)
Here is our precious boy in 3-D. The left image is his face at an angle, the one on the right is more of a profile. He had his hands over his face the whole time so that's why you see stuff on his face. The nurse was trying to go past the hand to get to his face.

On a surprising note, they did give us his measurements on how big he is. Get ready for this: He's a little over 5 pounds already and he's in the 94th percentile for growth! And I still have about 7 weeks to go, do the math. So yea, say a prayer for me when I deliver. This kid might give his cousin Evan a run for his money. I can see them sumo wrestling in the back yard right now! I think I just might nickname him "Bubba" from now on!

Here's a video of our son's face. See if you find him!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7IB8bZp5cE

Here's another video. Be prepared, in the first few seconds you'll see his...ahem...scrotum, there I said it! And boy was Daddy oh so proud!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hc3bZmxwAIg

Baby Shower #1

2008-05-07T08:23:00.000-07:00

My mother, me and my sister Jessica

To answer your question, yes, I'm having another baby shower. AND it's because I'm just soooo cool like that ;-). Since Nathan and I have good-sized families, I felt it necessary to have 2 baby showers. One for family and friends of the grandmothers. The other for my closest girlfriends. I really wanted my baby showers to be small and intimate, enough so that I can get the opportunity to have conversations with each person and make sure I greet everyone.

This past Saturday I had my first one for family. Brent and Roberta (FIL and wife) hosted it in their home which was perfect because they have the space and the location was great. Roberta orchestrated the days events with the help from Nathan's mom and my mom. Sarah, my darling SIL also helped out tons with games.

I walked in and was overwhelmed with how beautiful everything looked. It was as if I had walked into a garden of Spring flowers. The dress I wore that day actually matched the decor which was pretty cool if I don't say so myself. The cake Roberta ordered (which was awesome!) looked exactly like the invitation and my mother ordered the sculptured watermelon fruit basket which caught everyone's eyes. The catered food was delicious and well-presented.

I received so many gifts and I was amazed at how generous people were. People that I'm not personally close to but gave me some really expensive gifts. It was humbling and I was truly grateful. I already have Thank You notes in the mail already!

All 3 mom's did such an excellent job organizing the shower for me. I know how much time and hard work goes into planning showers. I've done them myself and it's no walk in the park. I'm blessed and spoiled. I have learned so much from these special ladies and I hope to take a piece of each of them and be as good of a mother as they are.

On to pregnancy stuff.
Today marks my 32nd week and the beginning of my 8th month! Crickey! No stretch marks yet (crossing fingers and knocking on my desk). But I am having a hard time getting my leg crossed so I can tie my sneaker laces. Good thing the weather's getting warmer so I can bypass the whole shoe-tying thing, and wear sandals or flats. What I'm about to say is a bit graphic, and something that no pregnant woman has ever told me (not sure WHY, maybe because it's so embarrassing), but it must be shared! I'm also having a hard time wiping myself "down there" when I go to the bathroom. Go ahead... take a few minutes to laugh and giggle.... My belly gets in the way and my arms are short, so I'll just leave it to your imagination!

Nathan and I have decided to take our condo off the market sooner than June 15. He brought up a few good points about whether I really wanted to be in the middle of moving with an infant. Ummmmm, no. He also said that the Open Houses and appointments we have frequently really stress me out. Ummmm, yes. Can't argue with either case. My hubby's wicked smaaaht.

31 week ultrasound video

2008-04-30T19:07:00.000-07:00

Here's a video Nathan took at my ultrasound appointment yesterday. At first you'll see the nurse measuring his heart, then you get a glimpse of his spine, then she zooms around to his face and his arm covers his face and for a few brief seconds you can see his face. Now you'll have to play the video over and over again to notice it. It's between seconds 40-50.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iZS6-t3MrGI

In this next video, the nurse is showing us fluid that was found surrounding his lungs. The reason I had this ultrasound appointment is because at my 18 week ultrasound, they found calcium deposits in his heart (a cardio focus), and they wanted to do a follow-up scan. Good news is that it's no longer there! But now of course they found something else. There's liquid not inside his lungs but outside. The doctor wants to keep a close eye on it because it has to do with the baby's Lymphatic system. She said that sometimes it goes away and sometimes it doesn't.I'm scheduled for another ultrasound next Wednesday (keep Baby M in your thoughts and prayers). I'm sure it's nothing serious, after all, doctors and nurses have to comb through everything they see in ultrasounds and be super cautious. And after the last scare with the calcium deposits in his heart, we've now discovered that they're no longer there. Nathan and I believe we have a fighter! Ding, ding!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pEKqd3L73_g

30 weeks, 10 weeks to go

2008-04-23T18:33:00.000-07:00

Wow, 10 weeks to go doesn't sound like it's too far away does it? This past week was good. Especially since the weather has been beautiful and I had the day off on Monday. We spent this past weekend with family. Saturday was with my mom and 4 dogs. Lots of fun and we watched the most intense Bruins game ever. Sunday afternoon I got to see my good ol' friend Bethany who moved to Nashville about a year and a half ago along with her parents. It was so good to see them! I miss them soooo much. Sunday night, we hung out with Nathan's mom and Mike and bought some yummy ice cream and watched the season finale of John Adams (HBO series). Monday we hung out with Nathan's dad and Roberta. I spent a good portion of the time hanging out with Roberta and her grandson's. We played outside, and had a great time while Nathan and his dad were playing golf.

I have a confession to make. I've looked at my registries to see what's been purchased. I KNOW! It's really terrible!!!! God, I'm so impatient. My family will read this and think I'm a total nut job. It's just that I'm so excited about what I've registered for. Come on, any of you who hasn't done this before cast the first stone ;-)

Nathan got to experience Baby M having the hiccups last night. I was creating my bed nest (8 pillow contraption, see below) and crawled in when I felt a very rhythmic thud.

I knew Baby M was having hiccups so I called Nathan in and he got to feel them. It was really cute. I read up on it today and the reason why fetus' get them is because they swallow amniotic fluid and exercise their diaphram to get ready for their first breath outside the womb. So yes, it's normal, and it's a great sign of his lung and diaphram development.

Before I forget let me share with you something a stranger told me at lunch that I consider a HUGE NO-NO to mention to a pregnant lady.

So I'm eating lunch at a table out in the patio at work and two girls walk up and ask if they can join me at the table (no more tables left and I was hogging one to myself). So they sat and we had casual talk. They asked me how far along I was, If I knew what I was having, blah, blah, blah, the usual questions asked...When one of the asked me if this was my first and I said, "Technically no. I had a miscarriage back in August." And that sparked a whole other discussion. Then the conversation turns sour when one of them said, "You know, I have a friend who's a little older who had a miscarriage at 7 months." (Insert a jawdrop here) HELLLOOOOOO, I"M 7 months, and WHY would you tell me that?! So I reply, "Oh wow.........soooo, do they know why it happened?" And she said, "No." Great way to leave a pregnant and already anxious woman hanging. So yea, that was really insensitive and stupid to say, but what are you going to do right?

Dizzy spells and the disappearing black hole

2008-04-17T10:09:00.000-07:00

Yesterday marked my 29th week of pregnancy. 11 more to go and Baby M is here! I took a walk the other day along the bike path (because the weather's been fabulous lately) and imagined what it would be like to hold him in the baby Bjorn and take walks together as a family. I can't wait! Walking has been good for me. I usually walk briskly for about 30 minutes with iPod and water in hand. I can't go too far for fear of needing to pee in the bushes, so I've managed to figure out how far I can actually go before heading back.

On Sunday morning and yesterday, I experienced dizzy spells. All of a sudden my breath seems shorter, I feel light-headed and it's almost like I'm going to pass out. I called the doctor but because I had no other warning signs, she said just to take it easy and make sure I'm hydrated and that I sit down when I feel that way. Nathan thought it might be my blood pressure but every time I get it checked it's low. I read online that sometimes it's caused by your body adjusting to the increased amounts of blood in your body. It's intense to think that I'm carrying 50% more blood in my body. Whatever it may be, it's not a fun feeling.

This "disappearing of the black hole" I'm referring to is my belly button. Ha! Can you believe I can actually see the "light" at the "end of the tunnel?" As my belly grows and tightens, my innie belly button's disappearing. Pretty dang exciting ey? I'm getting to the point where I feel like I need a crane to lift me off the couch. And I'm starting to weeble-wabble a little. Kind of like a Penguin, but a cute one. Along with my ever-growing belly is my ever growing butt and thighs! I feel like a big-fat-fatty and most of my pant legs are getting tighter. I'm about a buck-fifty now and can't imagine gaining more even though I will. Lord help me lose all this baby weight after I deliver. Amen.

I'm really excited about my baby showers coming up! Yes I'm having 2. One for family, the other for close friends. This way, it's not so overwhelming and huge and I can also spend more time greeting people. I feel great about what's on my registries because I did a crap load of research on each item, ensuring that I got the best, or close to the best items. It's amazing how your perspective changes once you know you're about to become a parent. All of a sudden I care about what kinds of chemicals are leeched into baby bottles, baby shampoos and products. I found some really informative websites that have educated me/opened my eyes to the dangers that may be lurking in baby products. I'll share them with you:
http://safemama.com/
http://www.cosmeticsdatabase.com/

AND I vowed to never be a paranoid parent! Pssshhh, now THAT'S out the window, LOL! But it never hurts to educate yourself at the expense of your child's health right?

Oh and an FYI that a good friend pointed out to me. Did you guys realize that the acronym for my blog "Pea In My Pod" is P.I.M.P? Haaaaahahahahahha!

Stats:
Age of fetus: 29 weeks (11 weeks to go!)
What's going on this week: His muscles and lungs are continuing to mature, and his head is growing bigger to make room for his developing brain. To meet his increasing nutritional demands, you'll need plenty of protein, vitamins C, folic acid, and iron. And because his bones are soaking up lots of calcium, be sure to drink your milk (or find another good source of calcium, such as cheese, yogurt, or enriched orange juice). This trimester, about 250 milligrams of calcium are deposited in your baby's hardening skeleton each day.
What's going on with Mommy: Some old friends — heartburn and constipation — may take center stage now. The pregnancy hormone progesterone relaxes smooth muscle tissue throughout your body, including your gastrointestinal tract. This relaxation, coupled with the crowding in your abdomen, slows digestion, which in turn can cause gas and heartburn — especially after a big meal — and contribute to constipation as well.

Your growing uterus may also be contributing to hemorrhoids. These swollen blood vessels in your rectal area are common during pregnancy and usually clear up in the weeks after giving birth. If they're itchy or painful, try soaking in a sitz bath or applying cold compresses medicated with witch hazel to the affected area. Also avoid sitting or standing for long stretches. Talk with your practitioner before using any over-the counter remedies during pregnancy, and let her know if you have any rectal bleeding. To prevent constipation, eat a high-fiber diet, drink plenty of water, and get some regular exercise.

Some women get something called "supine hypotensive syndrome" during pregnancy, where laying flat on your back causes a change in heart rate and blood pressure that makes you feel dizzy until you change position. You might note that you feel lightheaded if you stand up too quickly, too. To avoid "the spins" lie on your side rather than your back, and move slowly as you go from lying down to sitting and then standing. (Sounds like a lot of fun ey?!)
Baby's Size: Your baby now weighs about 2 1/2 pounds (like a butternut squash) and is a tad over 15 inches long from head to heel.
Mood: Happy
Cravings: None
Energy: Mostly low, lots of lower back and hip pain.
Morning Sickness: NONE!!!

Childbirth Classes and Cribs

2008-04-10T09:44:00.000-07:00

If anyone told me beforehand that I'd spend over 5 hours deciding on what crib to get, I'd look at them as if they were crazy and obsessed! Well, tis me, (going) crazy and obsessed. I swear, it seems like we're buying a car or something. Any woman who hasn't had a baby in recent years will tell you that they never had as many crib options as we do today. Nathan and I have gone to 2 different Babies R Us stores only to find out, they all have the same cribs and dressers on display.

Now if I were to compare the amount of cribs they have available online with what they have in-store, you'd be amazed. Sure, you can order a crib online, but then JUST as you find one you like, there's no matching dresser for it AND you don't get to preview one in person before you hit "Add Item to Cart." We're looking for a crib and dresser set (preferably a tall 5-drawer rather than the long ones) that our son can use for a 'lifetime.' You know, the one that's a crib, which converts to a toddler bed, to a day bed, to a full size bed.

Then we need to consider a child as he's teething. We love dark woods and even black, but when baby becomes a teething woodchuck, his marks will become very evident. We've decided recently that instead of rushing to choose a crib and dresser now, we'd take our time. Besides, am I really going to use the crib when Baby M comes home? Probably not. I'll probably use the pack and play or our bed. So we have time, no pressure, at least for now.

On to our first "Preparing for Childbirth" class. We had a pretty good sized group, about 8 couples total. All due in either June or July and delivering at the same hospital we will be delivering at. The instructor is a mother of 3, so I knew her information and knowledge would be very beneficial to me. Several things talked about traumatized me.

Traumatizing: When they showed how a baby fits through a mother's pelvic bone and how that bone expands to give room for the baby's head.

Traumatizing: When they gave us an illustration of what "dilating at 10 centimeters" looks like.

Traumatizing: When the instructor shows us a poster to illustrate where all of your internal organs end up as your baby grows.

Traumatizing: When your instructor says, "I'm not gonna lie to you all and say that delivering a baby feels like a lot of pressure. You will feel pain, the most intense pain you'll ever experience." Other than those few scary moments, Nathan and I were in awe that a woman is able to have children and that your body instinctively expels of the baby when it's the right time. I got a sense of empowerment as a woman, knowing that women can bear the most intense pain, yet they'd it all over again because it's worth it.

Well I'm officially in my 7th month now! 3 more months to go and he's here! Overall I feel good. I'm experiencing the awkwardness of the Braxton Hicks about 7 times a day, my lower back and hips constantly ache, and I find myself getting tired more often. My belly is now getting in the way of me comfortably washing the dishes. Maybe it's time to break the news to Nathan that he's now in charge of dishes. LOL! I'm now at a point where I can figure out where our baby's body parts are based on his movements. Whenever he stretches I can feel a round sized mass of what I believe to be is his butt. It's to the right of my belly button. So when he stretches out like that, I rub his bum and say, "BIG stretch!"

Stats:
Age of fetus: 28 weeks (11 weeks, 6 days to go!)
What's going on this week: He can blink his eyes, which now sport lashes. With his eyesight developing, he may be able to see the light that filters in through your womb. He's also developing billions of neurons in his brain and adding more body fat in preparation for life in the outside world.
What's going on with Mommy: You're in the home stretch! The third and final trimester starts this week. If you're like most women, you'll gain about 11 pounds this trimester. Around this time, some women feel an unpleasant "creepy-crawly" sensation in their lower legs and an irresistible urge to move them while trying to relax or sleep. If this sensation is at least temporarily relieved when you move, you may have what's known as restless legs syndrome (RLS). No one knows for sure what causes RLS, but it's relatively common among expectant mothers. Try stretching or massaging your legs, and cut down on caffeine, which can make the symptoms worse. Ask your caregiver if you should try iron supplements, which can sometimes relieve RLS.
Baby's Size: Your baby weighs two and a quarter pounds (like a Chinese cabbage) and measures 14.8 inches from the top of his head to his heels.
Mood: Happy
Cravings: None
Energy: Mostly low
Morning Sickness: NONE!!!

Anxiety is getting the best of me.

2008-04-05T11:05:00.000-07:00

Nothing can be more frightening or make your heart race, than leaving a message on a stranger's voicemail that's potentially going to watch your newborn full-time. We still have no day care set in place. Nathan and I know we can't afford a Day Care Center because it cost anywhere between $600-800 dollars a week (insert a jawdrop). That's DOUBLE our mortgage payment JUST for daycare. That doesn't include the extra money for health insurance, diapers/wipes/clothes/food, etc. Are you feeling my anxiety yet? So our other option that's not as much money is finding a Family Day care where you take your child to someone's home and they have a limited amount of children they watch. This could run anywhere between $400-500 a week. Still more than we can afford, but not as bad. I've left messages for several prospects today so hopefully they'll call me back ASAP.

I can just picture myself crying my eyes out as I drop off our son on my first day back to work. You're forced to trust your precious infant to a total stranger. Nathan and I have recently discussed what it would cost if I had the option to work part-time at work and only have our son go to day care twice a week. We're looking at it from all angles. How I wish I could stay home with him...sigh.

This week, I'll be 28 weeks pregnant! That's 7 months preggers, and in my third trimester. Our boy is growing so much and moving like you would not believe. We wonder what he looks like, what his personality will be and what will he take interest in. We talk to him all the time, especially at night when he's awake and most active. The other night we played the flash light game where you turn off all of the lights, turn a flashlight on and place it on my belly. It definitely caught his attention because he was moving and kicking a lot. So much so that we started feeling bad and stopped. Greeeat, here's mommy and daddy torturing this poor child with a bright light in his face!

I've definitely been more emotional lately. Things seem to bother me a bit more than normal. Whether it's how a coworker talks, the way my husband chews his food, or how slow someone is driving in front of me, I seem to be bothered. I think it's a mixture of me worrying about not selling our home, not finding a suitable day-care, making decisions about finding a pediatrician that shares our beliefs about certain health care opinions, labor and delivery and having enough money to afford a child.

What helps ease my mind is when I feel Baby M moving and kicking. I smile as I rub my stomach in all directions hoping that he feels me caress him through my stomach wall. "Mommy is here and I'm grateful for you. I love you so much and I can't wait to meet you." I'm much more calm after our connection.

Nothing is more precious to me or more amazing than to feel him moving inside of me. It's as if he's saying, "Mommy, I'm here and it's going to be OK. I hear your voice everyday and the sound of your heartbeat soothes me to sleep. I can't wait to meet you and daddy."

What's my husband's cell phone number?

2008-03-28T06:38:00.000-07:00

That's the question I asked myself a couple of nights ago while filling out my heath proxy. Nathan's had the same cell phone number for 7 years, you'd think I'd never forget it.
Here's more proof that my brain's gone to mush with this pregnancy:

I shaved every area possible, but completely forgot my right leg.
I took the Orange Juice out from the fridge, poured a glass and then stuck the container in the freezer.
Placed the tiny Half and Half cap on my huge coffee mug (yea, like that's gonna screw on).
Poured water to make coffee in the coffee filter (w/ ground coffee) instead of the water basin.
At least once a day, I forget what Nathan said a second after he said it.
Forgetting my passwords for pretty much everything I've had a password for and having to reset them and write them down.
Occasionally to bed with my contacts still in only to wake up with the driest eyes ever.

I'm sure there were more, I just can't remember ;-P When I do, I'll update this post.

On another note, did I ever mention that I'm married to the most incredible man in the world? I got to thinking yesterday after Nathan had the tires on my car replaced, how much he cares about me. I forget sometimes that not every soon-to-be-dad goes to every Dr.'s appointment with their wife. Even if it means they fall behind at work. Not every husband displays public affection and is not embarrassed. Not many wives have flowers hand delivered to their work for Valentine's Day every year or any other special occasion for that matter.

I never doubt if Nathan loves me. And I can be sure he never bad mouths me to others even when I've been a mean old witch. He seems to have a high tolerance for the emotional pain I sometimes put him through with my moody self. He always seems to make daily things a little more special for me or surprise me with something because he knows it will put a smile to my face. Like cleaning the kitchen before he leaves for school, or making the bed. God I love that man and I need to express it more often.

And now for the clip of the week. Here's a good reason why kids don't need expensive toys:

Stats:
Age of fetus: 26 weeks (96 days to go!)
What's going on this week:
The nerve pathways in hisears are developing, which means his response to sounds is growing more consistent. His lungs are developing now, too, as he continues to take small breaths of amniotic fluid — good practice for when he's born and takes that first breath of air. If you're having a boy, his testicles are beginning to descend into his scrotum — a trip that will take about two to three days.
Baby's Size: Your baby weighs a little less than 2 pounds and measures about 14 inches.
Mood: Overwhelmed by all the reading I'm doing to prepare myself for labor and delivery.
Cravings: None
Energy: Lower since my lower back, and groin muscles are aching and I'm not getting lots of sleep.
Morning Sickness: A little nausea from the smell when I cooked steak tips with Rosemary and Olive oil 2 nights ago.

Things I wish I'd have known about being pregnant

2008-03-21T12:22:00.000-07:00

I just found this list in another blog and laughed uncontrollably because I can relate to pretty much everything she says. I had to share it with you.

When a man says that you look like you’re due any day now (and you actually have, oh, two months to go) you have to seriously resist the urge to kick him in the balls.
That rolling from one side to the other in bed becomes a real challenge around 29 or 30 weeks.
That actually removing yourself from the bed may require use of a gigantic crane.
That if you lie back in the bathtub you can get stuck, like a turtle flipped on its back. Yep, happened to me!
That my body pillow is worth its weight in gold!
That I was so stupid to think my belly was big a few months ago. I had no idea what I was in for. And I have no idea what is gonna happen in the next 9 weeks.
That those cute little kicks would start to hurt as my big boy grows in there!
That I love, love, love feeling him move, even if it makes my stomach lurch.
That no matter how crappy my day is, he can make me laugh when he launches what feels like an earthquake in my belly.
That my husband would be so sweet and helpful during this time. He’s gone above and beyond… taking care of me and picking up all the slack around our home. He’s the best.
That hearing him talk about his hopes and dreams for our baby would make me fall in love with him all over again.
That decorating a baby’s room can become an obsession for a nesting momma-to-be.
That (dare I say it??) hemmorhoids really do happen during pregnancy. So gross.
That I am considering buying stock in Palmer’s Anti-Stretch Mark lotion. I’ve invested so much money in this stuff, and I slather it on every morning and night.
That I cheer every morning that I wake up without stretch marks… but I have a gut feeling they’re going to creep up sometime.
That as much as I love being pregnant with my baby, that my vanity gets the best of me sometimes, and I worry about never being attractive or sexy again.
That gaining weight, even when I know there is a good reason, is pretty hard to deal with.
That this baby makes me second-guess my career choices.
That I can’t find a single day care provider yet, who I’d trust with my precious son.
That I worry about how good of a mom I will be.
That I never knew how much I could love someone who I haven’t even met.
That 40 weeks is a long time to wait.

If you’re a mom… add your “I never knew” to this!

Source: http://kellybeans.wordpress.com/2007/03/22/never-knew/

Cartoon: www.everydaypeoplecartoons.com

Baby M kicks- Hayyyyyaaaa!

2008-03-21T06:25:00.000-07:00

On Tuesday night at around 11pm I was reclined in bed looking over some packets the hospital sent me. I had the folder propped up on my belly when all of a sudden, the folder jumped! It was probably the hardest kick I've felt so far. I placed the folder on my belly again. Sure enough, he kicked again. We had a fun game going on.

So on Wednesday, I decided to bring the camera with me to bad to see if he'd kick. At this point, I'm starting to notice his wake/sleep patterns. It's usually as mommy's trying to go to bed when Baby M decides to wake up and play. Without fail, he woke up and I have it on film to prove it. I placed a piece of paper on my belly so his movement and kicks will be more obvious for you to see.

I'm sure there will be many more videos like this. Enjoy!

Open House, sore back.

2008-03-17T18:52:00.000-07:00

Well our weekend was nothing short of eventfull. Sunday morning (day of Open House) we woke up early to finish off the house. I was already anxious about getting done by 1pm. Meaning, get all the trim in, paint it, re-clean the whole house and be out of there by 12:30. I told Nathan that all needed to be done by noon. Of course I added a time buffer to anticipate any last minute screw up's. If you know Nathan and I, you know one of us is typically late(ahem, ahem...not me). We were doing great on time when all of a sudden Nathan wants to do "one more thing." I told him that I think he shouldn't start because it would cut into my cleaning time. I was promised that all will be done by 12:00 so I had time to clean and be done by 12:30. Well, 12:30 came around at what was promised wasn't done yet.

I got all kinds of anxious and was frantically sweeping, mopping and bringing the dining table in the house to set things up. I asked Nathan to get all of the tools, the chop saw, and air compressor out of the house so I could clean. It was 1:55 and I almost had a panic attach. Nathan grabbed the trash bag and an 8 foot piece of trim. I had my purse, coat and trash in my hand, as I went to lock the door. All of a sudden we heard two people coming down the stairs. Holy crap, it was the agent and a potential buyer! We bumped into them and I said hi. By then I don't think they knew we were coming out of the unit they were going to. My blood was boiling at the fact that we even ran into them. Not cool.

I was so angry and upset at Nathan for again, promising he'd do somehting by a certain time, and not following through. You all know how much I love him and his many amazing qualities out weigh the bad ones, but this one character flaw drives me NUTS!

ANYways, after lunch I got over it and calmed down, but I felt my whole body aching and my back hurt so bad it was painful to walk. I felt horrible that I had allowed myself to get so stressed out and even put our unborn son through that. Our agent called us and said that we had 7 visitors come through. 2-3 of them were (nosey) neighbors and there were a couple of people who seeemed interested and left their phone numbers!

Today at work, I got a call from our listing agent's office with a message that there's a broker who wants to come and see our place with someone at 6:15 tomorrow evening. Considering the fact that there's only one picture (front of house) online, it was exciting to get a few nibbles already. We should have all of our pictures up on all the websites by tomorrow.

Home on the Market!

2008-03-14T17:44:00.000-07:00

Our home was finally put on the market today. After days of going to bed really late from renovating and refreshing most of the paint, we took pictures and felt so proud of our little home.

Tomorrow Nathan will spend all day installing all the new trim. We're taking a risk doing it ourselves but it's soo much cheaper and hopefully easy. We have our first open house on Sunday from 1-2:30. Hopefully we'll get some nibbles of interest from prospective buyers.

I had my doctor's appointment this morning and all went well. We heard the baby's heart beat and it sounded so strong. This time it sounded like the valves were snapping, which is a great indication that his heart is healthy. I'm right were I need to be with my measurements, and I now weigh 144 pounds. So far, I've gained 16 pounds and I'm expected to gain a pound a week from now on. I can't help but feel like a heifer, but my doctor reassured me that I'm fine and that she sees no resaon for concern. For my next appointment, I'll have my glucose test. It's usually done between 24-28 weeks of pregnancy to check for gestational diabetes and high blood sugar.

My doctor also brought up the subject of circumcision. I got the impression that she trying to sway us not to do it, but Nathan and I feel that there are no negatives to having our son circumsized. She recommended that we watch a video about what circumcision is and how it's performed, just so we have a knowledge of what actually happens. I don't think we'll be swayed in the other direction, but we'll certainly watch the video so we're educated.

Here are some updated pictures of me at 24 weeks. I was too lazy to put on the standard outfit from my previous pictures.

Stats:
Age of fetus: 24 weeks
What's going on this week:
Your baby's growing steadily, gaining about a quarter of a pound since last week, when he was just over a pound. Since he's almost a foot long (picture an ear of corn), that makes a pretty lean figure, but his body is filling out proportionally and he'll soon put on more baby fat. Your baby's skin is thin, translucent, and wrinkled, his brain is growing rapidly, and his taste buds are developing. His lungs are developing "branches" of the respiratory "tree" and cells that produce surfactant, a substance that helps the air sacs inflate easily.
What's going on with Mommy: The top of your uterus is now an inch or so above your belly button, which means it's about the size of a soccer ball. With the skin on your abdomen and breasts stretching, you may feel a little itchy now and then. If your skin is dry, keeping it well moisturized may help. Also, your eyes may be sensitive to light and feel gritty and dry. This is a perfectly normal pregnancy symptom known as dry-eye. To ease your discomfort, use an artificial tears solution to add moisture.
Baby's Size: Almost a foot long, and over a pound.
Mood: Anxious
Cravings: Cereal
Energy: High, but suffering with lots of backaches and swollen legs and feet.
Morning Sickness: NONE!!!

Happy 6 months!

2008-03-13T13:30:00.000-07:00

Yesterday marked my 6th month of pregnancy. So far, so good. Baby M has been moving a lot but for the past 3 days, I haven't noticed it much. Space is becoming limited I guess. Tomorrow morning I have a Doctor's appointment and I have tons of questions to ask. About delivery, finding a pediatric, questions about the controversial vaccinations and their links to other health issues, what contractions feel like, etc. I'm sure that last question will be immediately answered once I experience one.

Our home s coming together in terms of getting it ready to sell. I've been refreshing the paint, don't worry, I wear a mask, all windows opened and a fan running. ;-) I say that only for you worry warts. Poor Nathan's been so busy at school with his presentation and then he got food poisoning yesterday so you can only imagine what he had to go through. He should be home now, hopefully finishing the wall were our old stove was. Our new one's so nice! It pains me to see how nicely things are coming along, only to move if we sell it. I spent most of the week filling out what seemed to be an endless amount of paperwork to fill out and compile all the necessary paper I needed to give to our agent today. So now the keys are handed over. Let the games begin!

My mother and mother-in-law's are working so hard to plan my baby shower. With all three of their brains, I'm sure to have the best shower in the universe! It's crazy to think that it's only 2 months away. For the most part, the registry is done. Of course it wasn't without changing my mind a hundred times about certain items. What can I say? This is my first time being a mom.

Nathan and I have had our share of worrying about the kinds of parents we will be. We're no longer responsible for ourselves, we're responsible for another human being. The thought's quite overwhelming if you ask me. Some of the things I worry about are normal and I'm sure all mothers can relate to them. One of the things I worry about the most is being judged or criticized for the decisions Nathan and I make for our son that might not agree with others beliefs. Getting too much unsolicited advice about what we're doing or not doing, and feeling like I'm not doing, gasp..."the right thing." I keep on telling myself that each child is different and will have different needs. One way of parentings not perfect. The way "so and so" raised their child or children isn't the best way, and I need to remember that no matter what input comes my way. Catering to our child's specific needs should be good enough.

I'll see if Nathan can take an updated belly picture so I can update this blog!

Lookie me!

2008-03-06T10:26:00.000-08:00

Check out what I got to do for the first time this weekend! Almost 6 months pregnant and on the ice. Woohoo!

Nathan and I went up to Maine this past weekend to spend time with his mom and step dad as well as visit my sister and nieces. There was so much snow up in Maine that you could barely see anything through the windows. There were walls of snow everywhere. The views were so peaceful and spectacular that it made for a very relaxing time spent. The boys went down to the ice fishing shack to see if they could catch anything, so Pam and I decided to snow shoe our way there. It was the first time I had realized that I cannot bend over for long periods of time without losing my breath. I had to have Pam help me buckle my snow shoes for me. Away we went from their back yard onto the Lake. What a workout! I loved it though. As soon as we met up with the guys we took a break. Hey, who's that Paul Bunyan look-a-like in the background? ;-)

On Sunday we went up t visit my sister and the girls for the rest of the afternoon. They were so excited to see us. Nikki made Nathan and I the cutest Valentine's Day cards and Destiny showed me how good she's getting at her drawing skills. Naudia was completely amused at my belly as she lightly rubbed it. I showed her pictures of what a 22 week fetus looks like online and she was totally glued. She wanted to see more as I explained to her how her cousin can hear her if she speaks to him.
My sister got kicked in the face by her nephew as she placed her ear on my stomach! It was such a riot. They cooked us such a great meal and it was really nice to get a chance to see them.

Just for laughs, I had Nathan take a belly shot with both Mitch and I. Ummmm yea, Mitch has me beat by at least 4 months!

My sinuses have felt better and better and I'm not having snot rocket spasms in the middle of the night. Poor Nathan seems to always find used tissues on his side of the bed. Our son had the hiccups a couple of days ago which was really cute. I timed it and it went on every 7-10 seconds for about 2 minutes. My stomach's getting tighter and tighter and I find myself lubed up like one of those body-building grease balls. Hey, it keeps me from itching like a maniac!

This weekend, we're replacing the oven in our condo and next week, we're installing the trim throughout the place. Hopefully it will all be done by next Sunday (March 16) when we have our first Open House.

Age of fetus: 23 weeks

What's going on this week: His skin is red and wrinkled. Blood vessels in his lungs are developing to prepare him for breathing. He can swallow, but he normally won't pass his first stool (called meconium) until after birth. Loud noises heard often in utero — such as your dog barking or the roar of a vacuum cleaner — probably won't faze your baby when he hears them outside the womb.

Baby's Size: Your baby is more than 11 inches long and weighs just over a pound (about as much as a large mango).

Mood: Nervous about getting the condo ready and selling it.

Cravings: Orange Juice and cereal (not mixed together)

Energy: Good!

Online Window Shopping

2008-02-25T06:45:00.001-08:00

...Is a lot of fun!!! Check out these adorable items I found online.

Baseball Hat for Boys: KensingtonBaby.com

Johnny Cash Onesie: PsychoBabyOnline.com

Patchwork Cargo Shorts: OldNavy.com

Robeez Athletic Footwear: Robeez.com

Mommy & Baby Bath Mits: BabyNest.com

Here I am at 21 weeks

2008-02-22T17:33:00.000-08:00

Nathan just took some pictures to record my half-way mark. A VERY special thanks to my friend Lindsay for sending me the BEST shirt EVER along with some belly cream! On Wednesday night we were sitting on the couch and I felt baby M moving a lot, so I placed Nathan's hand firmly on my belly with my hand over his. Low and behold, Nathan felt his first kick. He looked up at me and said, "Was THAT him?" Of course it was. Now he only questions me because I constantly play tricks on him and make my stomach look like the baby kicked.

I've been feeling really well. I have lots of energy at this time, so I'm trying to get lots of odds and ends done around the house as we're planning on selling our condo. Yup, it's too small and I'm having "Nest Anxiety." We have a listing agent coming to the house tomorrow morning so we've been decluttering and cleaning like crazy. When I say crazy, I mean cleaning walls, creveses you wouldn't normally clean, washing windows inside and out, scrubbing the grout throughout my livingroom, and oh so much more.

Now the miracle will be to sell this place within 4 months. I'm curious to see what our agent says our condo's worth and what we might get for it. If we don't sell this place then we're prepared to stay here and go nuts with the lack of space. We can make it work, but boy it would be nice to have an extra bedroom.

Stats:
Age of fetus: 21 weeks
What's going on this week: Your baby is really on the move now. Fetal researchers say babies move about 50 times an hour even while sleeping. All that movement helps stimulate your baby's physical and mental development. You may not notice 50 kicks, punches, and twirls during the day, but as you're settling down at night, don't be surprised if your little guy seems ready to dance the night away.
Baby's Size: Your baby now weighs about three-quarters of a pound and is approximately 10 1/2 inches long.
Mood: Happy
Cravings: Toast
Energy: High, doing lots of cleaning and organizing
Morning Sickness: NONE!!!

woooah were halfway there!

2008-02-13T17:42:00.000-08:00

Woooahh, livin' on a prayer. Sorry I had to finish that...

Yes, today's the halfway mark. I'm now 20 weeks! I can hardly believe it either. It was the first time at my doctors appointment when she actually measured my belly. The baby's heart beat was pumping away and it brought a huge smile to my face knowing that in just 4 months, I'll hold my baby boy in my arms. Today I signed Nathan and I up for "Preparing for Childbirth" classes starting in April. Woot, woot!

I've gained about 7 pounds so far (not bad ey?). It's the first time in my life where I don't feel bad about weight gain. Hey, pregnancy's pretty cool like that. You feel a little more liberated to "strut your stuff" and rub that belly. God, I never thought I'd utter those words! I feel sacred, I feel sexy, I feel needed and overjoyed.

So remember when I told you all how I've been craving gummy/chewy anything???

Yea, I wasn't joking either, Lord have mercy! God help my unborn child and the sugar rushes he gets when I get those cravings too. It's really the only craving I have. Pickles now and then but gummy candy rocks the cashbah!

Nathan and I...actually, let me rephrase that, I have been really worried about the space or lack there of, in our condo. It's a little over 600 square feet with one bedroom. I can only imagine how much the lack of room will magnify when the baby and all the "stuff" takes up every inch of our home. Soooo, I've convinced Nathan that we need to move to something a bit bigger. I'm not talking about a 3 bedroom apartment with double car garage. I just need an extra bedroom and some sorage space, that's all right? Well I wish it was that easy.

We need to get our condo on the market right now, and think about what we'll do. Will we buy another place a lot farther away from where we work, or will we rent for a couple of years till Nathan graduates? I know, it's a lot to think about and do before the baby comes. I think Nathan and I are on the same page now. Nathan's issue was distance if we moved farther West.

Especially since he's in the lab. He couldn't just come home for dinner then come back to school. He'd have to stay there and then get home late into the night. He feels like he'd miss out on watching his newborn son grow. For me, my issue was space. I didn't care about the distance as long as we had room to breathe. We don't want to neglect each other's main issue with moving, so we've come to a middle ground that I think will work.

Stats:

Age of fetus: 20 weeks

What's going on this week: A greasy white substance called vernix caseosa coats his entire body to protect his skin during its long submersion in amniotic fluid. (This slick coating also eases the journey down the birth canal.)Your baby is swallowing more, which is good practice for his digestive system. He's also producing meconium, a black, sticky substance that's the result of cell loss, digestive secretion, and swallowed amniotic fluid. This meconium will accumulate in his bowels, and you'll see it in his first messy diaper (although a few babies pass it in utero or during delivery).

Baby's Size: Your baby weighs about 10 1/2 ounces now. He's also around 6 1/2 inches long from head to bottom, and about 10 inches from head to heel — the length of a banana. (For the first 20 weeks, we use measurements taken from the top of the baby's head to her bottom — known as the "crown to rump" measurement. After that, we use measurements from head to toe. This is because a baby's legs are curled up against his torso during the first half of pregnancy and are very hard to measure.)

Mood: Happy

Cravings: See first image above

Energy: Feeling better now that my sinus infection's gone.